wife – Page 9 – Contemplating the divine

Back on track

Well, the consensus seems to be that Google has backed down, so here we go again.

Have a double-length post to make up for it. Oh – and for the next three weeks or so there will be an additional caption each day on the Tumblr site, that will not appear here (because my filing system is too disorganised to find the right ones, if I delete the Tumblr queue).

****ing Google.

Don’t worry. You don’t have to do anything she doesn’t want you to do. In fact, you mustn’t.

Who says men are useless, eh?

I expect you’ll manage well enough without.

It’s bound to be a bit painful at first. But you’ll get used to it.

I’ve always had this ability to make women laugh. I think I was born with it.

When he left school, he wanted to work in IT. And he does – he usually stops by that department just before lunch

I think we’ve all been there. Just the other day a market research company rang up and asked if I was interested in taking part in a survey about web use. So I said sure, but after about five or six questions about my browsing habits, they just rang off without any warning! Bizarre, huh? I mean why did they ask if they don’t want to know the answers?

Something to look forward to.

That’s good of her.

Another thing to tick off her bucket list.

Wifely duties

Oh, darling – I made an appointment with a disciplinarian,
like we talked about. I asked if you
could go tomorrow, but apparently it’s better not to do it straight away, so
you can dread it for a few days. Anyway, I’ve provisionally booked you in for
Tuesday – is that OK? You’d have to
leave work a bit early.

Fine. I’ll call her
to confirm.

Could you pass my skirt?

No, the blue one.

Thanks.

Now there’s a video you’re supposed to watch – of her caning
someone, she sent a link. She said you should watch it as soon as possible, so
you know how bad it’s going to be. It’s
about 20 minutes long – I think we’ve just got time right now before we go,
actually.

I watched the first minute or so and then I had to switch
off because it was so brutal! She just
flicks the cane down and there are these awful marks – well, you’ll see. He was crying and pleading – I just couldn’t
watch any more! It’s horrible to think of
her doing that to you. I hope we don’t
have to do this very often.

Now, did you get a bottle of wine like I asked you?

Oh darling, you didn’t forget did you, really? I made a point of reminding you this
morning. Oh how tiresome. You see – this is just the sort of thing I
mean. Honestly, I could cane you myself
right now, I really could.

Just scream and weep

She’ll do the rest.

Well, at least you can be confident you’re in safe hands. They’re obviously all trained professionals – look, they’ve got nurses’ outfits and everything.

Oh well. No regrets, eh? Strawberries are good.

I think she might be right. She usually is.

And where’s the fun in that?

This of course is the lovely Mistress Vixen, sometimes to be found virtually at the address shown there. Oh go on then, I did it for you. But she seems to be out.

What an unpleasant little tale. Why would anyone write something like that?

Feeling her pain

…it’s just something she likes me to do from time to time.

Strictly speaking, that’s probably against school rules. I mean, it’s not as if the chalk’s her property, after all.

It’s up to you whether you sign of course – and feel free to take your time. She can always do you after lunch, if you can hold out that long. Not a problem.

Thank you. Ahhh.

That sounds very fair.

Glad to be of service. It’s the highlight of my month, actually.

Resistance is futile

Utterly futile.

I love the way a recent article in the Guardian about science fiction on British TV just *happened* to use an image from this episode featuring whip-wielding dominatrices to exemplify the series Space 1999.

That’s only fair, because you’re not in fact safe.

The awesome Jean Bardot.

Aww… look at that little pout. Isn’t she sweet when she’s cross? Better do what the little woman says, hmmm? Just to humour her, you know. You can assert yourself later, I expect.

If you want a picture of the future, imagine a sweaty trainer stamping on a human face — forever*.

I do.

Mistress Francesca Harding, prepared it would seem to help with life-long learning experiences.

*Test time! What is the slightly garbled literary reference? Hmm? Anyone? You! You at the back – hands out of your pockets, boy! – what’s the answer?

Helplessly devoted

Oh relax! Look if George is hetero too, then it’s not like you’re going to be having gay sex anyway, is it? I mean, who’s going to make you do it?

The offence? Oh – unauthorised erection, I think. Now just watch the caning very carefully and try not to let it happen again, OK?

Could get expensive.

Well I think it’s rather sweet.

Men can be so obsessive about these little things.

Hymn to her

And she will always carry on

It’s been a while since I did this, but I believe that you begin with the examination of conscience. Oh, and penance is involved somewhere down the line. Quite definitely.

Hmm. What makes me think the answer by the end of the evening will turn out to have been ‘both’?

As far as I know, there aren’t any countries that provide constitutional rights to have a tantrum. So you’d better just bend over.

Tantrums featuring a lot today. New husbands are prone to them. Experienced husbands, less so. You’re about to become a lot more experienced, by the look of this! Many happy returns of the day.

And although she seems to be looking away, it’s probably best not to pout when she’s given you this information, if you still have hopes of next month too.

Unreasonable force

He’s a lucky guy.

Planet Femdom, of course. If you like statuesque ladies brutally dominating… well, that bloke mostly. I do, actually. Rather a lot.

Cruelty-free farming has its downsides. Still, I’m glad she found a solution.

Oh dear. Another of those painful conversations.

Actually, the story is rather simple. The post of office tampon boy was advertised, so he studied, and prepared and pulled every string he knew of to get it. But wouldn’t you?

Try not to take it too badly. Just because you’ll be spending the rest of your life alone, in poverty, with your empty days filled only with the longing for her doesn’t mean you have to be miserable. It just makes it very, very likely.

Authority figures

I like a woman who knows what she wants. Don’t you?

Mmmm. If you pay extra maybe she’ll ignore you even more.

It’s tragic, the breakdown in authority in schools these days. Don’t you think?

Mmmm… pretty exciting, huh? I wonder what she has planned? A really hard spanking?

Actually, I have a ‘frequently annoying traveller’ card. So they don’t have to make any special arrangements: the stewardesses just slap me on sight. I get special meals too.

Relationship management

I don’t really have much of a managerial role in our relationship, actually, so I don’t know too much about that. This is what I know about:

It’s not easy being newlyweds – so many things to learn about how to live together. Thank goodness for whips, eh?

Oh – and for some tips about marriage? Try Servitor’s seven secrets series. You’ll never see marriage in the same way again.

No indeed. He’s only got one left, and he’d hate to lose it.

Now I want you to know that Mistress Eleise, who features so beautifully in this image, would never really use a coathanger as a sound. Not unless it was strictly necessary, anyway.

Why do I imagine that what they decide to do about it will also involve beating…?

It’s actually quite hard doing open-heart surgery when you’re having an orgasm. Fortunately, it’s only a man they’re operating on.