Heels over head in love

Like many submissive men, I pay not to have sex. 


At school, once, this boy and I were talking about some girl and he said “I’d like to get in her knickers!”  So when, a few weeks later, after a midnight excursion, I was able to tell him I was in her knickers, I thought he’d be jealous.  But he wasn’t, oddly enough. It was just a misunderstanding.  How we laughed. The whole class laughed, if I remember rightly.

Benji is actually the Honourable Sir Benjamin Kettleworth-Harcourt, FRCS, but of course he can neither remember nor pronounce that.









Married couples should talk about their interests more.









How does she know I’m scrumptious?  I didn’t detect a French accent, there.


You made a life out of hurting me

Well, a career anyway.  (warning: link is DSFW*)


*Disappointingly safe for work.

Yeah, just do whatever comes naturally.  She doesn’t mind.






Apparently, onset of the male menopause can occur as early as your 20s.  You just have to marry the right woman.

And what’s Ioannis got that I haven’t, I’d like to know? 
In an emergency, she could always just use one of the hotel’s coathangers or something.

She only puts the big ones on her trophy wall.  Smaller ones she makes into into novelty hat or shoe racks and sells them on e-bay..


I beg to differ

But I’m never allowed to, so I don’t really know why I bother.


On we go …

At first, she used to follow the approach of other dommes; in trying to put first-time clients at their ease.  Reassure them that nothing too bad would happen, you know?  But then she decided one day it was just too dishonest.

Relationships can take many different forms.  You’d be surprised how many stable partnerships are based on a solid foundation of contempt and abuse.  Works for me.

Maybe you could ask about the oral sex later.  Still worth a try, surely?

Actually,
in my opinion, equality between the sexes is a very bad idea.  But I’m
posting this caption anyway, in the spirit of recognising that my
opinion is of no importance whatsoever.

 

Like I said, relationships can take many forms.  ‘Husband’, ‘lover’, ‘piss-slave to lesbian couple’ – they’re all just different words for the same thing, fundamentally, don’t you agree?


Thank Goddess it’s Friday!

It’s always such a relief to get home on a Friday evening after a tough week at work, when there’s still a few hours to make an early start on the weekend chores.


It’s a bit disappointing that they started without you, actually.  Maybe you should say something? Marriages should be founded on mutual respect.

What a lot of canes she has. One would be quite enough to reduce me to total obedience.  Women, eh?  Can’t control those shopping instincts.  Bless ’em.

Some time it really has to be my turn to serve. Surely.

Most blokes only play at 10, you see, and where can you go from there?

A very good point.  Sexual identity can be complicated.  Best to have someone else in charge of it, I say.
The lovely Mistress Akella, there.  But I forgot!  You’re gay (now) – so I don’t suppose you’re that interested in her?

Incidentally, readers, have any of you noticed that the new British Prime Minister has the same name as a rather splendid British domme?  Well, there’s an ‘h’ of difference but that’s all.  I can’t see the coincidence doing either of their careers any good at all, to be honest, but I wish both well.

Her husband; her rules

It’s only fair, right?



She can certainly make you less happy in the days and years to come, should she choose to do so. Thoroughly miserable, in fact.  So in that sense, today is indeed the high point.

Sounds exciting!  Some sort of wet ‘n’ messy play, I imagine?

Yes, you really must stay to comfort her. It can’t have been easy for her, losing three husbands in a row like that.
 I don’t usually link to tumblrs but I will give a shout-out to Strict Widow, as I love the concept and I’m using it quite a lot for material!
Ah – a caption turning on the finer points of English grammar.  One for the Editor Domme, there.
 While we’re on the subject of tumblrs…  Just remember you’re apostrophe’s if you comment on her site, for gods sake, OK?
Dominant males quite often feature in this blog, actually.  You can’t always tell the difference between them and the subs, but believe me, when I post a picture of some male under female control, with hands secured and cock firmly locked away or absent, it’s often a male dom formerly known as “Master Roger” or some such.







…and here‘s an extra one, without words.  

There’s something she forgot to say to you

Celebrate the conscious liberation of the female state!

The company has a very strict policy agaimst sexual harassment too.  So don’t worry about that. If you’re groped, or propositioned or demeaned in any way, you can complain to your boss, right then and there.

Hmm.  Looks like he’s going to be spending a lot of time bent over the the engine, today.

She might have her own list of course.
Nope.  No hangups there.  None whatsoever. I have five years of blog postings to prove it.

 

Female liberation. Quite the best sort.

Unconditional

A word used mainly with “love” or “surrender”.  Or – best of all – both.



Never seen her scrubbing her back with the bath brush, though. 

Still, he’ll have a unique souvenir of what looks to have been a memorable session.

Yes, M’m, thankee M’m.

And so does everyone else.  Not that they care.

Yeah, that would be awful.  Let me know if you see anyone like that reading the blog, OK?  I’ll kick them right off.


Wedlocked

One day you’ll laugh about it. Everyone else does, after all.
 
 
Mmm… that does sound humiliating!

 

 

 

Actually, he’s lucky.  The bricks are  little bit irregular.  If it wasn’t for that to engage his interest…well, he’d have had a pretty boring time of it over the years, I can tell you.
 
 

 

She’s trying to make this work – why aren’t you?
 
 

 

Actually, you can make a fuss if you want.  It doesn’t really matter.

Stop your sobbing


She’s very particular about the gardening – that’s why she has them whipped so often.  She’s very particular about sex too, but then as her husband you know that already don’t you?
 

 

It must be very difficult for her, being trapped in a sexless marriage like that.  Still, she could probably play around a bit.  I mean, it’s only fair.  And who knows – maybe one day they’ll find the key.
 
 
 
She did make a particular point of how cruel and heartless she was in the advert, to be fair.
 
 

 

Women, eh?  There’s always one more thing, isn’t there?
 
 

 

Pesky Geneva Convention. 

So bandwagon!  Much out-of-date meme.  Many comic sans (sorry Steve!).

Sub-shaming

It’s a strangely self-defeating exercise, because we love it.

Sympathy porn
That’s kind of her.  Not exactly a sympathy fuck… more of a pitiful wank.  But the principle’s the same.
 
 



Castration lit again
Kinda scary.  Yeah.
 
 

 
 
 

I hold that truth to be self-evident.
 
 

Accidental scene
OK, now that would be humiliating.  And not in a good way.  Well…maybe a little bit good…mmmm.
 
 
Creepy Servitor
It’s uncanny.  It’s almost as if she knows me.  Do you think I should go and hang around her house in Beverly Hills… see if fate somehow brings us together?
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