femdom – Page 74 – Contemplating the divine

Enthralled

What a lovely word. I am her thrall.

Happiest day of your life! And don’t you forget it, you ungrateful little bastard, or she’ll give you something to be unhappy about!

It’s not just convicted sexists, either. Carry the donor card, help someone to look fabulous after your death.

I’ve never liked spiders. Bitter acrid flavour and the legs get stuck between your teeth.

Looks fun. And they give you a little souvenir bag of sugar at the end of the month. Give it to your domme, the next time you book a normal session and thank your lucky stars it’s just fantasy play.

He found her through a card she’d put up in the local telegraphy office.

The thing

You know – the thing that’s going on. That thing. Here are some hurriedly thrown together captions about the thing.

You see, it’s just like I always say. Everything is femdom.

Even the thing.

So… those are my captions about the thing. Now, as I’m just sitting around at home all day, these days, I’ll just get back to reading the Trip to Matilda’s story on Freddie’s blog. Which I am enjoying a lot, actually. You might too, who knows? Only one way to find out, isn’t there?

Advisory warning

Following the triumphant failure of the long-running series ‘Advice to a novice sub‘, this blog impertinently presents the first batch of a brand new series: ‘Advice to a novice domme’.

How dare I, you ask? Hmmm. That’s a good question, actually.

And most important of all (so why isn’t it #1 – who decides these things anyway?):

…and a bonus image!

Looks like this lovely lady needs to read #18, up there, again. It took her hours to put this lot together and it’s not like he pays any more than anyone else.

Ooh!

It’s as far as I can take it.

Do you think you could ask him to slow down for just a moment while I write the captions under the pictures? No? OK, well, I’ll do my – ouch, that was a deep one! – I’ll do my best.

Sounds like someone’s having a bad day. Who’d have thought being sissy maid to a sadistic perfectionist would be so difficult?

Trick question. You need a lot more and she’s waiting for you to tell her that. It’s a Mars/Venus thing, just go with it.

Her sister rebelled against the whole female supremacy thing. Lives with a guy in Brighton and she lets him have his own pocket money and she even helps out occasionally with the housework. Still, each to their own.

What a very sharp observation.

Divine Order

I worship her divine shadow.

I’ve had a few bruising relationships myself, but I usually have to pay for them.

Unless she forgets, obviously.

It’s obviously preying on her mind, the poor thing.

I pay a sex worker to have vanilla intercourse, once a month. She usually sends me a picture of the lucky guy.

She’ll get round to yours. You just need to wait very patiently. Try shifting your weight from side to side a bit if your knees are starting to hurt.

Cries of pain are music for her banquet

A quote, or nearly so, from George Eliot, who shamefully had to pretend to be a man to get published. What an embarassment that must be, for a woman. Do you suppose she had to make spelling mistakes, miss deadlines and generally dumb down in correspondence with her publisher, just to appear authetically male?

Still, the quotation is rather a lovely image, isn’t it? Here are some more.

Her impotence treatment works every time – it’s a remarkable medical breakthrough, actually.

She seems nice. What a shame you’re nothing special. Better luck in Somalia.

She’s such a sweet person, wouldn’t hurt a fly in real life. Still: she’ll flog him bloody and then piss on the wounds, because that’s the kind of professional she is. Then go and have dinner with Dave and maybe a cuddle before bed.

Castration manga is actually a great way to interest girls in comic books, because it’s using the medium to speak to issues that concern them as women, you know? Also: it’s just a lot of fun, obviously.

He was quite fat when they started training him. Still some way off the target weight of zero that they are aiming for, but he’ll get there. In fact, he’s going to lose a whole bunch of weight all in one go next Thursday: they just haven’t told him yet.

Fair maidens, faint hearts

I find it’s always easier to tell the truth. The aftermath is sometimes extremely difficult.

I have my pride. At least, I did. Hang on…it’s got to be here somewhere.

By a curious coincidence, I got the cattle prod for ‘last night’ the very second day of my marriage.

I get quite excited about this sort of thing.

I heard Jason was having an operation so I sent flowers and my best wishes for a full recovery. Well, you never know, he might.

An orderly marriage

Without question.

Good. Can’t wait for my consciousness to be raised.

10 is the new 8? You know, just the other week my SO was caning me and I thought we’d finished but she announced that 12 was the new 6! I don’t know… when I learnt maths in school it all seemed a lot simpler than that. You just held your hand out and counted until she was finished.

Actually, the vicar turned up on time and I have to say: he was quite cross to see what was happening on top of his altar! So that was a bit embarassing, but the rest of the wedding day passed off smoothly. The night didn’t go so well, unfortunately, but thank goodness Sven was there too or I think things would really have been difficult.

If I manage to find a copy of the video, I’ll share it with you. I’ve never actually posted a funny cat video – must be the only blog on the Internet not to have done so.

Shattered ever after

“My other daughter, Cinderella”, the merchant
gabbled, bowing low to the Prince and his party. A
haughty young blonde strode into the room, sat down in the armchair and
crossed her booted legs. She stared with contempt at her father and step-sisters, huddled together against the back wall.

“Well?” she demanded. “Get on with your chores” and she watched them scurry from the room, stammering their apologies.

The Prince sank to his knees before her. “May I?” he murmured, reaching out with a
trembling hand. She nodded curtly and the Prince slowly
unzipped her boot with his right hand, cradling the heel in his left. A moist,
warm miasma emerged as the loosened boot was gently lifted free.

“Sorry about the smell. Been on my feet all day”, Cinderella
explained.

“It’s, erm… it’s no problem at all.” gasped the
Prince. “You know, Lord Chamberlain, I think we don’t even
need to try the slipper.
This is obviously the right pair of… pair of feet.” and he moved closer,
his face hovering just above the damp, stockinged foot.

“Oh yes. Yes: these are the feet.”

“Are you sure, your Majesty?” the Chamberlain
replied. “They look a little on the
large side to -”

“Well then the slipper must have shrunk!”
snapped the prince, not taking his eyes from the foot he held so gently.

“Shrunk, Sire?” the Chamberlain replied, one eyebrow
raised. “The glass
slipper?”

The Prince turned on him in fury.
“How dare you question your Prince!
Arrest this man! I shall decide
what to do with him later.”

“Perhaps a few years in the salt mines?” Cinderella suggested. “With hard labour? I’ve heard that can be quite
effective.”

The Prince looked up into her blue eyes in shock. “That’s quite a harsh, erm… well, for a man in
his age and condition…
I think…” he tailed off, noting a distinct pout coming over the lovely features
above him.

“Quite right, my dear, of course.” he continued. “As you wish.”

Her restored smile seemed
to light up the room. “And we won’t be needing
that silly thing” she added, indicating the glass slipper with an elegant
finger. The finger pointed towards a spot on the
floor, where the Prince placed it.

Stand back”, she instructed. And down
came Cinderella’s other, still-booted, foot shattering the slipper into ten
thousand iridescent shards.

“Oh dear” she smiled. “So now I suppose whoever’s foot fits into that gets to be Queen?”, and the Prince raised the boot he was holding in shaking hands towards her gracefully-pointed toes.

And it was a perfect fit.

Further Downton

More of these.

I should apologise to male readers in advance, many of whom may find some of the material here not to their taste: several of the captions contain a lot of words, some of them quite long and obscure, such as ‘vicarious’, ‘distraught’ and ‘conscientious’. If it’s too difficult for you, try asking a woman (if you know any) what the words mean, or you can just masturbate to the pictures of the pretty ladies looking stern, all right?