blonde – Page 21 – Contemplating the divine

Shameful display!

Apologies to anyone offended by this image of a male actually experiencing sexual pleasure. Don’t worry – he’ll be made to suffer for it later.

Time for a witty, cutting rejoinder, I think. Just try to think of one.

Details, details. Women – why do they always have to explain everything like that?

These details matter to her. So now they matter to you.

A very fair point. On with the spreader gag and let’s give it a go!

Extra Anne for the anonymous commenters who rightly pointed out that the captioned image of Anne in a space suit last time was a repost. Just a silly mistake, by an old fool.

Like lovers do

Sex..?. Don’t talk to me about sex. I tried it once – not tryin’ that again. Nearly got me ‘ead stuck!
Joke copyright Alexei Sayle.

It’s wilful impertinence on your part. So’s being too early, obviously.

Scurry scurry scurry…

Don’t worry. She’s quite sweet, really. When she’s not in a bad mood.

In space, no one can hear you sigh with hopeless romantic infatuation…

At this moment, you mean everything

You in that dress
My thoughts I confess
Verge on dirty
Oh, come on Eileen..pleeease.

It’s good to be fit. You get to be flogged further, before collapsing.

Oh, OK. And I suppose my opinion counts for nothing, here?

Good thing you have an ironing fetish! You don’t? Oh. Oh well.

Shall I compare thee to a… errrr… purple cucumber? Thou art more knobbly and thy veins pulse with lust…

One of my virtual girlfriends is programmed to find out about the others, and ridicule me.

Actually, that’s not true. I can’t keep a virtual girlfriend for long. They always reject me. So unkind…

Too late to reconsider

(no one’s gonna wanna know yer… trigger warning: vanilla video unrelated to femdom)

It took him ages to get her interested in golf, you know.

Men can be such drama queens. Getting upset over the littlest things.

Oh, OK. As long as I know. Thanks.

What a sad little caption. Sad little servitor wrote it.

Press them but not mount them.

Penile servitude

Aooooarrrahhh-oooo, eeehhhhuuuh!

I’m sure we’ve all been there.

That’s true, actually. I mean, I certainly don’t experience pain the way my Significant Other does. I experience it a lot more frequently, for a start.

“Just” in the sense of “only”

Hmm. 16 orgasms in less than a minute. Quite a performance. Let’s try not to repeat it.

Sexual discrimination

When only the very best is good enough.

Its nice when a man can get involved in his girlfriend’s hobby, don’t you think?

Oh! Oh! Here’s one! How many blondes does it take to whip an impertinent male until he’s crying helplessly for mercy? Hmm?

It’s better to give than to receive.

S&M in mainstream advertising… always a pleasant find.

And he loves it when she beats his brains out

(he’s pecked to death but he loves the pain)

She’s not talking to you.

I think you’re about to get a free session.

I think we can all agree and rejoice that this is the lovely Jean Bardot, can we not?

Hmmm. Two captions in one post about a domme actually hurting someone who doesn’t want to be hurt. Servitor – reprinting the same old shit since 2011.

I like an unhurried session. For example, I’ve got a humiliation scene going that’s been building nicely for… oooh, about 47 years now.

Bloody typical! Doesn’t ask me how my day was, does she? But to be fair, it’s hard to say at this stage whether it’s been a good, bad or howlingly agonising day. Not until she’s decided.