But you won’t cry, I know

Angry tears are too dear.

She likes it when you say please and thank you, but you need to get used to saying them quickly, because once she starts using alternating hands, it gets pretty fast.
Men need to take responsibility for their own behaviour. His body, his fault.
They say when you’re in a hole it’s best to stop digging… although my experience has always been that if I’m digging a hole I’d better damn well keep digging as fast as I can, until she tells me to stop.
Don’t get your hopes up, she rarely keeps the boys she collects when she’s out.
And if she does finally snap and put you on the leash, for goodness’ sake don’t make her drag you along. It’s not fair to expect her to do all the work in the relationship.
She doesn’t realise what a career boost a photo feature in AFM can provide. Take a look at some of the shots from the magazine I’ve featured here – A-listers, almost all of them.*

* Fans of AFM – yes, there are some, you’re not the weirdest reader of this blog, you know, not by a long chalk – can look forward to a great start to 2025. No spoilers, though.

4 thoughts on “But you won’t cry, I know”

  1. The Guardian only the other day had a big article on foot fetishising. Up until now my wife has assumed that I just like to give her foot massages. Now she has a journalist’s confirmation that it is something sexual, so it is firmly off the menu.

    And now you highlight armpits, my one remaining consolation prize.

    I am bereft.

    Mr M

    1. Fortunately, the media reach of Contemplating The Divine is still noticeably less than that of The Guardian, so you should be all right for a while.

      Unlike Armpit Fetshist Monthly, increasingly regarded by business leaders and cultural trend-setters as the publication of record of our times.

      Best wishes

      S

  2. No need for my penis or tongue. I’ve been replaced by a female vibrator When she uses it in front of me She loves to watch my frustration and humiliation.

    1. Oh, I’m sure she’ll see sense. Machines can’t do everything a human can. Ask yourself – could a machine get her laundry all clean and smelling fresh? I mean, yes, obviously it could, but it wouldn’t be anything like as much fun for her, sitting with a glass of wine, watching it do its thing, would it? Same with footstools – sure, she could put her feet up on some kind of wood and cloth construction, but it just wouldn’t be the same. She’ll find something for you to do for her, you’ll see.

      Best wishes

      S

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