With grovelling apologies to anyone with even the slightest taste, it’s a special OWK poetry day! You see, I – no, come back! Really, it’s not that bad, and anyway at least there are pictures of –
Hello?
Anyone still here?
Oh well, just you and me, then. OWK poetry, anyway, all based on the kind of traditional British canon I learnt (but perhaps suprisingly given my interests did not actually have beaten into me) at school. More difficult than it looks, even done this badly, especially as there is essentially no one-word rhyme in English for ‘kingdom’, or for that matter ‘Owk’.
Just in case any of you are interested, puzzled or just entirely short of better things to do sitting there, as you are, in front of a computer with your trousers down around your ankles, the actual poems these are mangled from are, in order:
- How do I love thee?
- Jabberwocky
- The Tyger
- The Waste Land
- Elegy written in a country churchyard
- To his coy Mistress
Roses are red
Balls are blue
Sperm is scum
So boys don’t cum
Say it loud and there’s music playing, say it soft and it’s almost like praying. Maria…
Best wishes
S
Men are filthy things that need to be punished.
They are. That’s why so many disciplinarians like to wear gloves when correcting their inferiors, so they don’t have to touch the beastly things.
Best wishes
S
……..and he drove the fastest milk cart in the west.
Ah, now that’s proper poetry, that is.
She said she’d like to bathe in milk, he said, “All right, sweetheart, ”
And when he’d finished work one night he loaded up his cart.
He said, “D’you want it pasturize? ‘Cause pasturize is best, ”
She says, “Ernie, I’ll be happy if it comes up to my chest.”
Ah… those were the days. Maybe some time I’ll do a pastiche of a 1970s femdom mag, instead of the 1980s ones I churn out now. Or just a Benny Hill femdom story…
Although actually there was (very) occasional femdom content. Super-tame and cheesy, obviously, but wow, it lit up my teenage brain when it suddenly appeared at the end of one episode: https://femalevillains.fandom.com/wiki/Wanda_The_Wicked_West_Wickham_Whip_Woman_(Benny_Hill)
Best wishes
S
Good point.
A pray or a spell