Stories and pictures themed around female domination and male subjugation and servitude. Unsuitable for children, for alpha males, for hard-core practitioners with an interest in the politics of bdsm and the mechanics of complicated rope work. Of interest to perverts like me, basically.
Oh, you will.
 |
| He should be more sensitive. Fortunately, parts of him are, so she can start working on those. |
 |
| It can’t be for clothes, because she buys them for you. And you’re not allowed alcohol or cigarettes. |
 |
| She calls it “head-spanking”. Isn’t that cute? |
 |
| Of course, it’s just possible they’ll take a bit longer than an hour. So – best to stop all that frantic banging and wriggling about. |
 |
| Won’t your wife be pleased when you get home and show her? |
These ladies have them.
 |
| Oooh! Oooh! I don’t have a foot fetish either Ma’am! Oh dear, Pleeeease don’t make me lick your dirty feet clean Ma’am! |
 |
| Still, he’s lucky to be inside in weather like this. Best half-hour of the day. |
 |
| Hmmm. How are we going to resolve this? |
 |
| And don’t think she’s impressed when you buy the extra-large condoms, either. She knows they’re not for you. |
 |
| You’ve made her very happy today. |
Often undervalued, don’t you think? It’s the chill of fear striking deep into my stomach, as I watch the minute hand creep closer to the appointed hour, the hesitancy with which I approach the door and the tremble in my hand as I reach out for the doorbell that – for me – makes it more than just another way of getting bruises.
Ahem.
Next!
 |
| Don’t be fooled by that severe exterior. She’s actually a very kind person. Why did you know, she gives 20% of all your money to animal charities? |
 |
| Of course, she’ll need training. The Headmistress reckons that Mr Jones, the maths teacher, might be available to assist. |
 |
| Apparently, the new one has voice recognition. You have to train it to recognise your voice, though. So you say “Clean the floor.” If it doesn’t do it – press the red button to zap its balls. Then repeat the command. It’s quite uncanny how accurate and responsive it can become. |
 |
| That Raoul has always had a wicked sense of humour. Remember that time he told her you’d called her a bitch? |
 |
| What a lucky man you are that someone so attractive takes the trouble to despise you. |
Not such an obvious question as you might imagine. Yes, on the one hand, obviously women should make all the decisions. But in our present, highly imperfect society, dominant wives effectively get two votes and owners of stables of slaves get a whole bunch.
I’m actually really interested in politics, myself. I like to watch all the debates, and sort out the issues in my mind, as it helps me guess which party my Significant Other is likely to tell me to vote for.
Here we go again – femdom captions all right for you? Lovely.
 |
| Last fancy dress party, she wore her leather outfit and you wore that little maid dress. The time before she went as a strict schoolteacher and you as a schoolboy. It’s just as well your parents don’t know anything about this stuff, or they might begin to see a pattern and stop inviting you. |
 |
| As you’ve probably discovered by now, the world is full of beautiful women who really want you to fuck off. I find that usually I know that without them even needing to tell me any more. It’s a Mars/Venus thing, really. |
 |
| I think the club has a special lapel-pin you can wear. |
 |
| She probably won’t actually tell him, in order to avoid panic. If he needs to know, he’ll know. |
 |
| Isn’t she pretty? Don’t pictures like this make you feel you don’t deserve even to be scraped off the sole of her shoe? |
With a big hello to search engines from all over.
Now, after a headline like that, I suppose there had better be some captioned images of female domination, hadn’t there?
 |
| But also more enjoyable for her. There’s always an upside. |
 |
| So with this one I – ow! – excuse me, I was just – OOH! – I’m sorry, I really…ohhhh that hurts!…need to move on to the next. No caption here. |
 |
| OW! No better! |
 |
| Right. Think calm thoughts. It’s funny – we give our cat the stuff in tins as a treat, and the dry biscuity stuff for normal food. So when my wife makes me eat the contents of one of the tins, I guess both me and the cat are unhappy about it. |
 |
| Isn’t it an awful feeling? When you just know you’re going to have an argument. But all arguments end, you know that too. And you’ll be a better husband for it, after all. |
Something too few men understand. When a woman says no, that’s just what she means. No you can’t stay out late. No you’re going to stay down there until I come. No, not after your behaviour this month. No, you signed the contract and that’s that. That sort of thing. Get used to it.
 |
| For some reason, that particular paddle is called “Angela”. She might call you at work, to let you know that Angela’s going to be coming around that evening, that kind of thing. |
 |
| It’s nice to know there’s someone to pop in to feed them, if need be, so you don’t need to leave them any use of their hands when you’re away for a week or two. |
 |
| You’re allowed to discharge yourself, you know. You just need to fill out a form. You have to ask her for one. And a pen. |
 |
| It was such a relief to their mother, whose arm used to get quite tired in the first days of their marriage. |
 |
| It’s a bit like being a kid again, isn’t it? Those feelings of longing and anticipation for months before…and then it’s not exactly what you wanted, or it just doesn’t turn out as expected? Still, being able to deal with these feelings is what makes us grown-ups, right? |
There seems to be a discontinued Christian blog, that had the same name as this one. I occasionally like to run headlines like that, to make a few minds explode.
Rather naughty, I know. Fortunately, it seems I’ll be getting a beating quite soon, so there will be penance.
More sinful pictures below:
 |
| Bet you’re glad you didn’t look at their bottoms, aren’t you? Oh. Oh dear. |
 |
| Actually, the way the ones who are already thin react to the starvation diet can be even funnier. |
 |
| Come on – don’t be such a baby! It’s not as if she hasn’t whipped you before! |
 |
| My favourite place. |
 |
| Another little service you can do for her. |
 |
| Better hurry up and get used to it – you’re late for work. |
 |
| Planning a session…hope it’s like this. |
 |
| She really appreciates it, because she knows how uncomfortable it makes you feel, seeing her in lingerie like that. You can go and run some cold water over it if you like – but make sure you dry it off, so it can’t rust. |
 |
| …and I’m certainly not allowed to write it. |
 |
| Men can get so frustrated waiting for women to get ready. It’s a good thing she has you to help. |
Here’s one:
This has to be the kinkiest thing I have ever seen on TV. It’s a show I’ve never even heard of, and it seems almost painfully stupid in every way. I think watching any other episode would probably make my eyeballs explode. Not a line can be uttered without gurning, not an actor acts without over-acting. You can almost hear the ‘ba-boom’ after each obvious punchline. It’s hard to believe it’s aimed at adults. And yet it ran with one episode that contains everything that the Exit to Eden movie could have had and didn’t (you’ll see why I compare it to that terrible film if you watch it).
Look: a warning to people who take their BDSM seriously. This is just a joke about the lifestyle, using it as an excuse for a cheap laugh, OK? I know that offends some people, and I understand why. Personally, I find mainstream depictions of the lifestyle that are just kitschy stereotypes rather erotic – in a way, the cartoonishness is oddly part of the attraction. If you want to see a celebration of the seriousness of the emotional commitment of an S&M relationship, this programme is not for you. Nor’s this blog, probably.
But the leading actress is icily attractive, and there are some nice scenes with good stuff going on, mainly in the background. So anyway, if you like that sort of thing (and I warn you again – it is quite stunningly stupid), here you go:
http://www.hulu.com/watch/2594/jack-of-all-trades-x-marquis-the-spot
PS – the Hulu thing will only work if your computer is located within the USA. But that’s why we have proxy servers, right? Of course, you didn’t hear that from me…
And another…
If you’re British you probably already know this, but there’s an (equally kitschy! Less explicit. Less stupid.) episode of Space 1999 – Britain’s rather strange answer to Star Trek – called Devil’s Planet: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GnZ3sYIvLqo
The ladies with whips appear around 8 minutes in. Though at 7, there’s a sequence of a spaceship crash-landing that’s really rather good for 1977!
In the novellization (oh yes: as a teenager I scoured the bookshops until I found it – bet that volume outsold all other Space 1999 books) came the line “I shall hunt him down and from his skin I shall make a whip!”. It still haunts my dreams.
