Category: Uncategorised

Strictly controlled

It’s actually an important sign of how well a relationship is developing, when a couple can both be in the bathroom at the same time without embarassment. I can still remember the first time the woman who became my SO came into the bathroom to pee, while I was there. I wanted to leave, but I was much too firmly tied in position to go anywhere, and as the ring gag prevented me saying anything, I just had to lie there while she did her business – which I found quite distasteful at the time, but it was the first of many such intimate moments and nowadays it just seems routine.
But if you don’t, then there’s ‘fear of missing out’ so really you don’t have any easy options.
It takes a lot of control and self-discipline to be a ballerina, so laundry boy’s going to have to up his standards to meet theirs. Good of so many of them to make the effort to help help him see how he needs to improve, especially after a long hard rehearsal.
Ironically enough, she actually does believe that all men should be treated equally and with exactly the same degree of dignity.
Don’t worry: Sami won’t do anything unless her owner lets her.
My own subconscious often seeks out brutal punishment beatings, usually by making me behave in an “irritating” manner without any conscious intent to do so. Funny things, minds. Even male ones, which must be relatively simple.

Pleading hearts

Don’t worry if you’re not ‘man enough to take it’, that won’t bother her in the least.
If it gets too irritating, she could always turn it into one of those cults where everyone kills themselves. Or I suppose she could just stop reading their prayer-filled messages on social media… Anyway, she has options.
She’ll see the funny side eventually.
That’s the third time Mistress ‘forgot’ this month. She never used to be that forgetful. I do hope she’s all right.
If it’s really the nails that are bothering you, she could use screws? Or just industrial glue, I suppose, but that would be a lot less fun for her.
Or have a sissy-fight over it, with lots of shrieking and hair-pulling.

At her mercy

If she has any.

It’s all right, he has a desk job so as long as he can basically limp in and his fingers aren’t too bruised to type, it’ll be OK.
Apparently it’s best not to think about it too much. But then, when it happens, it’s hard to think about anything else. Dilemma, really. Where’s all that thoughtlessness that got you into this mess, when you really need it?
I expect the two of them will get a bit jealous, of all five of you down there together.
Don’t worry: she’ll make sure you get what you deserve.
Actually, professional wrestling’s all for show: no one really gets hurt. Of course, as an amateur, that doesn’t apply to you, but it’s nice to know, isn’t it?
I don’t know what she’s talking about; just put this up because I thought the two of them looked pretty.

New year, new armpits

I have occasionally featured material from this blog’s sweaty sister publication Armpit Fetishist Monthly. Now as you all know, AFM (as the cognos-scenty call it) has long ago abandoned its origins as a jazz mag for lonely perverts with a bizarre fetish for mainly shaven female armpits and has branched out into trenchant political analysis, social commentary and artistic ideas that set the cultural agenda, for lonely perverts with a bizarre fetish for mainly shaven female armpits.

But it has never forgotten its roots and this year I am delighted to bring you the girls from the AFM 2025 calendar!

Eternal glory to the heroines of the revolution!

Ages since I did one of these. Glimpses of informative public information posters from another world: a better, if occasionally just a tad authoritarian, world.

Look, boys, they gave you the option of doing this the easy way, OK? But you chose differently.

Indisputable truths

Don’t worry, you’re not doing too badly. The most important thing is to take her orders. Adverbs like ‘literally’, ‘immediately’, ‘subserviently’, ‘unquestioningly’ are important but next-level.
Men in strict chastity see many more sexy women on the streets… simple fact. It’s best to treat it as a bonus of the regime.
Another bonus: no need to worry about self-control when someone else is doing the controlling.
She’ll give you her hand in marriage and you’ll take it.
The first time I defied my SO’s orders, soon after we married, I was worried she’d be upset but in fact she enjoyed herself immensely over the next four or five hours.
She’s just read him a lovely bed-time story called “Spunk on my face!”

And apropos nothing very much, here’s a nice little bit of found femdom, which corresponds closely to a scenario I’ve featured once or twice here.

It’s beginning to look a lot like femdom

Goddess bless us, one and all!

Get that excited happy face ready! Nothing worse than handing someone a present you think they’ll be excited about and they’re just ‘meh’. Well, there actually are worse things at Christmas than that, believe me, especially after my mother-in-law’s had a bit too much to drink, but that kind of let down is pretty bad, is what I’m saying. And I’m sure you don’t want to disappoint the lovely lady.
To be honest, some of the party games the guys let me join in aren’t all that fun for me. ‘Pin the tail on the donkey’, for instance – I’m sure it’s not really supposed to be played like that.
Christmas is a time for giving – she understands that. And if she’s got some piggies left over who aren’t completely drained yet, why not share the joy?
It’s the most wonderful time of the year.
Just wait until everyone sees your fairy dance routine!
I hope any female readers will spare a thought for all those subs spending Christmas alone… chained up in the cellar, locked away in a punishment cupboard or just put into a burlap sack and tossed in the corner, forgotten and ignored. Hundreds of them, thousands maybe… uncomfortable and miserable. Isn’t that a lovely thought? What a shame it’s only once a year.
Some parents like to pretend the castration fairy isn’t real, but we know she is, don’t we readers?

It’s the best rule there is

Been a while since I did a post about Rule 18. Why? Oh, probably because that series isn’t really femdom and no one likes it. But I was thinking… do I actually care what my readers like? Do they deserve to see stuff they like? The answer to both questions has to be no, of course not. And you know you don’t deserve that, if you’re honest with yourselves, don’t you, hmm? That’s right. So this is what you get today.

For anyone confused, beyond the normal male mental fog, ‘Rule 18’ is from Servitor’s (rather presumptuous and impertinent) advice to a novice domme and it states “try to avoid sessions with clients who have really specific fetishes and can’t get off unless it is exactly right.”

Mostly just silly pictures, but some have captions. Oh – and at the end, some illustrations of why Rule 3 matters, too.

To comply with decency laws, the picture has been cropped to avoid showing what is holding up the central peg. Incidentally, in English croquet, unlike the American version, you don’t hold either of the pairs of balls down with your foot when you whack them with the mallet. Though that does sound fun.
“Of course it is! Gahhh – it’s ruined now!” (Rule 18, ma’am, rule 18…)
And this one too. He said green wellies, dammit. Green!
If they finish the piece and he doesn’t clap, they’ll beat the crap out of him, of course. Oh, and if he does he’ll collapse, they’ll fall off and then they’ll… well, I’m sure you can guess.
I hope she’s remembered to bring all the latex, this time.
Don’t ask. She just wants to get it over with.
Best to hold the session when the tide’s going out, I’ve heard.
Now that’s just obscene. Do people really…?
Howl!

Post-script: I promised you some Rule 3 illustrations too. Rule 3? Oh, yeah, sure: “You are not expected to have sex with your clients. Thank goodness.” Basically, just images of particularly unattractive malesubs*, especially in the presence of a gorgeous goddess.

Divine Mistress Heather, of course, kindly letting her sub land in water for the practice attempt before the filming starts.

* I suppose some people might object to my sneering at the appearance of people who are – after all – just male submissives like myself. Why should they be singled out to be degraded and humiliated, by my mocking them in this way? Isn’t it unfair? And the answer is yes, of course, it is: they really ought to be paying for this treatment, the cheap little bastards. But hey, it’s nearly Christmas, right? They can have this one as a freebie.

That little chat

You know… that little chat. The one she’s been promising you all week. Don’t keep her waiting.

And don’t forget what happens to sissies who tell lies. Although I don’t imagine you will, after that last time.
Oooh – potential ally! Maybe you could start by explaining how oppressive and inappropriate disciplinary spankings are, see how she reacts, then develop the conversation from there.
Unlike many mothers-in-law she’s quite pleased with her daughter’s choice of husband and enjoys her visits.
Maybe they’ll have a ‘bring your sissy to work day’ at the silo.
Those slaveboys… they get up to such mischief. Good thing she’s there to keep an eye on him.
He is lucky. Look at all that effort she’s putting into their relationship.

The wonderful Lady Kenworthy, demonstrating the sound of one hand clapping.

When she clicks her fingers

I can simultaneously be desperate, lazy and incompetent, can’t I? I thought women were in favour of multitasking.
I think her defeated male opponents are just sore losers.
Teachers love hearing from their former pupils, especially ones who have gone on to develop successful businesses or professional careers.
Try to enter the spirit of the thing by being horribly embarassed and hating every moment. Remember: they’re laughing at you not with you.

Image reminds me of my favourite ever search term, back when this blog was on blogger (you got to see search terms that led ‘readers’ there), which was “tutu humiliation -bishop -desmond”.

He was also going to report them for smoking in a public building, so they use him to dispose of the evidence.
I don’t see what’s crazy about that. I mean it’s a nice car, but…