female-led relationships – Contemplating the divine

No woman is so good or so bad, but that at any moment she is capable of the most diabolical as well as of the most divine

I don’t think she should pander to the male gaze like that – why should she have to go to the trouble of snapping her bra every few months just for his pleasure?

He should have read her FAQs more carefully. OK, they don’t specifically mention beards – or anything to do with facial hair, to be honest – but they are quite clear about being ‘annoying’ and I think even beardy-boys can be expected to read between the lines just a little.

Oooh – sissy maid play? But what shall we iron?

As is usually the case when one has to leave a video call early, it took Trevor a minute or two over his official ‘hard stop’ deadline to extricate himself from the call. But she was very understanding about it. Not forgiving – not in the least – but very understanding.

They say the nervous waiting, wondering what it will be like, is the worst part. But that probably just goes to show that ‘they’ have never been fucked hard enough up the arse, as that is definitely the worst part.

Woman’s inhumanity to man

Which is obviously fine, humanity being properly reserved for humans not apes or maggots.

I’ve heard the trick is to think about other things, OK? The two weeks will fly by. Now hurry up with that lotion: she’s waiting.

And if you’re *not* actually her 4 o’clock pervert, just go on up anyway. She isn’t particular.

Realistic goals, firm boundaries, severe consequences. Secret of a happy marriage, right?

She’s right, they’re already starting to look ugly and horrible.

Particularly disappointing given the ants’ matriatrchal society. You’d think they’d at least have a nibble… ant cannot live on honey alone.

Even the grimmest, most unpleasant situations can benefit from a little joke, he always used to say.

Incidentally, my captions here often feature the wonderful Mistress Eleise (with whom I had the pleasure and pain in Paris of a session or three) objecting to blonde jokes. But that’s just my invention. Maybe she really likes them, collects them and treasures examples in which the blonde is being particularly dumb? If anyone visits Canada and if she’s still working, do try a few out and let us know how it goes.

Whipping yarns

Sometimes, the simplest things – and males are *very* simple – can be the hardest to explain.

Quite right too – how absurd to claim any incidents involved excessive brutality. The level of brutality is always just right.

Working for Mistress is a reward in itself and she’s very generous with her rewards.

She’s covered against accidental breakages too.

She’s a very keen gardener – has boys out there in all weathers planting, potting, pruning or just spending a few hours making the lawn nice and neat with a pair of nail scissors.

Sometimes she’s just not in the mood to tolerate it… oddly enough, the consequences are much the same in both cases.

Managing directrices

Their ‘at your desk’ service is very popular. Alternatively, they can just take control of your male employees remotely and sort the problem out that way, but most of their users prefer to watch them work in person.

Well… OK. Sounds pretty standard to me. Do they have good wi fi?

He hasn’t been told himself yet, so I expect he’s eager to hear your guesses.

The wonderful, clever and lovely Tiffany Naylor, who nayled me good and proper a few years back. I still have the warm glow.

There’s always extras. Still, probably worth it for the talented Sven. If she enjoys card games, for example, he could play Gin Rummy all evening and poker all night.

They’re not designed that way, but why not give it a go?

Just as long as she understands that she can’t force you to do anything your wife’s not comfortable with.

Unsafe spaces

If you want to experience the thrill of taking risks in public, try disobeying her.

It’s their civic duty, unpleasant though it might be.

Ah… the sadistic new lesbian girlfriend. Always a tricky transition in any sub-male’s life.

Mistresses Hannah and Sarah are unavailable too… odd, that.
The whole N*z* girl thing is actually something of a declining fetish. I understand in America, liberal subs are increasingly requesting dommes to wear red MAGA caps, while conservatives want schoolmarmy types who will force them to state their pronouns. Maybe there’s hope yet, to heal the rift.

Ooh, maybe you’ll get to have sex with her! Or at least, you’ll get to have someone having sex with you, quite near her.

I told my regular domme recently that I’d find it very exciting if she were to spend a romantic evening with another woman, culiminating in lesbian sex, while I was kept in chastity and ignored. Turns out she’d already been doing that for months, if not years! So that’s quite a lot of backdated session fees I owe her.

Implacably romantic

Ah…. the holidays are over. So much laundry to do, so many ‘thank you for the fuck’ postcards to send to her holiday beaux. But it’s good to be back to abnormal.

This (tiresomely) repeated theme I run here, of dommes getting bored during foot or shoe worship is thoroughly inaccurate, of course. One of my former dommes used to say she loved extended shoe worship play – it gave her a chance to catch up on all her social media.

Nothing like being fucked up the arse and in the mouth by a gang of big hairy men to cure that irrational fear of gay sex. At the very least, it can turn it into a rational fear and it might even be the start of something beautiful.

Whichever kind Mistress Mina wants, I would suggest. But he might be limited to marques that don’t involve a lot of plosive consonant sounds, given the ball-gag.

Nothing unusual about feeling a bit nervous before getting married. It’s like going to the dentist… as soon as you’re strapped to the chair and you realise the dentist is planning to use a manual drill on your teeth and she’s not giving you anaesthetic, it’s too late so you might as well just lie back and scream so she can enjoy it.

Not illegal. It’s OK to own a cattle prod, as long as you don’t use it on animals, because there are animal cruelty laws preventing that.

Relentlessly romantic

And it makes her life easier too – she can focus her disciplinary efforts on gratifying her own sexual desires, instead of constantly having to make you scream for mercy over simple household tasks inadequately carried out.

You don’t want to make it her problem, believe me. She employs very effective problem-solving techniques.

Well she could look a bit more interested! I mean, here you are, ready to scream your guts out as you thrash around in agony for everyone else’s pleasure…

I can date to the very day – almost to the very stroke – the moment I reached the same realisation, in my own blissfully happy marriage.

She’ll get the hang of it. You can’t make an omelette without breaking a few kitchen slaves, am I right?

Actually, she’s unfairly disparaging* AFM’s technology section here. Just in the last few issues they’ve reviewed all the latest electronic air fresheners – focusing on how easy it is to change the scent they disperse – they’ve had some fascinating pieces on the microfungus ecologies that thrive and provide such rich aromas from even the cleanest armpits and they have tested out all of the latest AI models with a carefully standardised prompt crafted to induce them to describe a particular activity (can’t remember what it was) in as much detail as possible. Plus reviews of shaving technologies obviously.

*But then, Ms Palvin is very welcome to disparage me unfairly as hard and as often as she wants. I live for the hope that one day she will.

The real religion of the world comes from women much more than from men – from mothers most of all, who carry the key of our souls in their bosoms.

Yes, it’s the day* to celebrate mothers. Loving, nurturing and kind to their offspring, brutally savage and eternally contemptuous of their sons-in-law. The latter relationship is more this blog’s focus, for obvious reasons.

Many subs who get off on the idea of punishment, not to mention being humiliated and treated with contempt, don’t realise how much more effectively those can be provided by a woman of more advanced years, who has had longer to hone her opinions and approach towards the male sex.

She has an excellent reason: she dislikes you intensely.

Oh don’t read things into the captions that aren’t there! Of course she didn’t murder him! He died of nervous exhaustion, poor chap.

Obviously you shouldn’t have to pay full session rates, just for cleaning out her Mum’s garage. Ask for a 40% discount, at least – and don’t settle for less than 5%.

It’s good that mothers and daughters phone each other so frequently.

Don’t worry, she’s not going to be a burden. In fact, she can help a lot with the housework: checking all the tasks have been done satisfactorily, drawing up schedules and providing advice and encouragement wherever needed.

* Some of you might be wondering why we’re doing this today, when everyone knows Mothers’ Day is in May? If so, it’s probably because you’re American and have forgotten there are what we call ‘other places’ in the world, and some of those don’t do things in the same way you do. Don’t worry, it’s an easy mistake to make, especially if you’re working with the disadvantage of only having a male brain. Try taking a trip somewhere ‘else’ to broaden your horizons – I hear the Gulf of Mexico is nice at this time of year.

That’s what she said

Don’t make her say it twice.

I’m sure Julie won’t mind at all but it’s always polite to ask.

My SO likes to play this game and would you believe it, I’ve lost 23 times in a row. What are the odds?* I would say I’m very unlucky but I’m so lucky to be married to such a wonderful lady, that would be churlish.

* Just over one in ten million. “Do the maths” – as a Governess I used to visit used to say – “then bend over the punishment bench so I can do the marking”.

Many relationships that end in divorce could actually be saved if only the woman were prepared to make her husband do the work.

There’s usually a little crowd of embarassed-looking beta-boys waiting outside that club, so you can pass the time in awkward chats with them. You can bond over lucky you all are to have the opportunity perhaps to be useful to your goddesses, boyfriend jealousy issues, how you deal with chafing from your chastity belts and all that kind of subbie stuff. As long as she’s given permission, obviously.

The divine Mistress Akella, there.

It’s about time an A-list star called out these creepy publications that use images of actresses without permission, to titillate their sad and perverted readership. This blog applauds Ms Scarlett’s courage in speaking out.

Don’t worry, she’s not going to hurt you

…without good reason.