feelings of utter inadequacy – Page 2 – Contemplating the divine

Suffering fools

Gladly or otherwise.

I never want to be more than two paces behind… for the rest of my life.

I hate having to disturb her when she’s working. But I can’t just take money from her purse without permission, so…

Tony gets steak and chips… not fair, I say. But then he does have a night of vigorous sexual activity ahead of him, so I suppose he needs the calories.

Sometimes they get a babysitter, but if they’re not going out until 7.30 or so, it’s easier just to put Paul to bed half an hour early. I mean it’s not like anything can go wrong, with his mittens fastened to the sides of the cucky-drawer.

Aparently, a lot of condemned prisoners have women writing to them offering sex. I don’t think that’s going to happen to him, though.

Power play

Ah… the abusive dommie-psycho-mommie scene. Part of every domme’s standard repertoire. And all you need to get started are some wire coathangers.

The previous guy found the smell a bit pungent too. In fact, he said it made him vomit, it was so bad. But I’m sure he was exaggerating.

Everyone knows women all love sitting around having their boots cleaned and then smeared with semen. It’s amazing dommes get away with charging their clients so much to let them do it, really.

Hee hee. I’ve actually let it drain to 90% but I’m going to tell her it’s fully charged, because 90% is still a green light! Pretty sneaky, huh? That’s at least 25 minutes less screaming in agony. Guess I’ll show her!

It won’t matter to anyone who matters, anyway.

How do I love thee, let me count the strokes and thank you for each one

I wonder if it would be OK to ask for a drink of something to help wash it down.

Position 53… 53… erm, like Position 14 but arms crossed, right?

Still, I have to say I got my money’s worth for the session.

She’s too soft-hearted. Fortunately, Mr Travis isn’t.

I think he’s not a morning person. Nor’s she, truth be told, but there’s so much to do and only so many hours in the day.

Honourable ladies

…but of course they all are, are they not?

Ah well. Back to real life.

I once asked a domme for a session where I’d be treated with total contempt and indifference. I paid her the session fee in advance and then I never heard back from her – then when I tried to get in touch I found my emails and my phone number were blocked. Best session ever.

Don’t worry about the spanking marks. She won’t be embarassed.

I’ve heard in some restaurants, the staff spit in your food if you’re rude. I was in a cafe the other day where the waitress was really beautiful, so I was tempted to insult her just on the offchance, you know, but I couldn’t bring myself to do it. Just too sub, I guess.

Many men come too early. January, February – that kind of thing But with the right amount of control (preferably made of steel) you should find you can hold back almost indefinitely.

Just a little prick…

… oh, I’m not even going to go there. It’s a very old joke and not very funny.

Let’s have some brand new and not very funny captions instead.

Dommes don’t care about these things, but we subs do. The taste is quite different, for one thing.

It’s good to experiment a bit.

I’m one of her regular clients. First Tuesday of every month, 9.35 to 9.38. It gives meaning to my otherwise pointless existence.

Men do seem to be making some pretty strange democratic choices just now, you’ve got to admit.

um…

Well versed in etiquette

Fastidious and precise.

Maybe ask for a prescription for some painkillers?

Well, obviously not every month. That would be silly. But maybe occasionally..?

Shame clothing. I’ve never found I’ve needed it.

Who needs pocket money when your skirts don’t even have pockets?

Hmm. It might be a while before the next blog posting. And it might be a bit dull… (more so than usual, even).

Riddle of the minx

Don’t you? Just sign you heartless bastard – look how you’re upsetting her!

Actually, there are surprisingly few blogs catering for those with a mushroom fetish. And this one probably won’t again, so enjoy it while you can. Deviants.

Mistress Asian, like it says on the picture. Welcome to the blog, Ma’am!

Really experienced dommes understand our desires so well. And don’t care.

This is of course the lovely and talented Princess Kali!

Don’t worry, it doesn’t go all the way down. Everything below 4 inches is just in the same category. Now what was it they
called it… er…?

Ermmm…hang on, I think I’ve got a witty answer to that, so I can pretend the question does not make me uncomfortable.

Tender loving care

Time to celebrate those heroines of the medical profession. Where would we be without them? Still experiencing unwanted erections in many cases, I expect.

And let’s face it, if you’re honest with yourself you probably wouldn’t be due a lot of financial compensation anyway, would you?

Men just aren’t suited to this sort of thing. Too squeamish. But do the best you can. I’m sure you don’t want to disappoint her.

She’s got a really effective treatment for that.

She’ll need a complete history listing all your sexual partners as well, but that should be very quick, no?

That tiresome bureaucracy.

Married, with consequences

Married couples should talk about their finances. Too few do – but it can save a lot of pain later on.

Than you Susan. (braces)

I hope she doesn’t give in to peer pressure. When she decides to have you castrated it should be because that’s what she wants to do. No other considerations should come into it.

Nasty man with big smelly feet. Really smelly feet. I can’t understand what she sees in him.

Those surveys… I think all they do is make women feel unsatisfied. And I should know.

Untruth or consequences

So, what did you do in London, my mother asks me as I walk in.

Paid someone to tie me up, beat me and piss on me. I think.

Oh – nothing much, I reply. Just saw some friends.

You smell nice. Have you just washed your hair?

Well yes, actually. Rather thoroughly.