chastity – Contemplating the divine

Approval required

But rarely granted.

Yeah, everything’s fine. All under control.

You might think this is even worse than that couple caught on the audience cam but don’t worry: it’s all consensual. The three ladies were asked and they said they didn’t mind at all their subs being exposed and humiliated in a clip gathering hundreds of millions of views.

She has quite a lot of interaction with her readership (as do I when the sodding spam filter permits it). She encourages readers to send in their dick pics, for example, often with the dicks in question artfully arranged in vases, or hung as Christmas decorations. She prefers not to receive any of the actual dicks, of course, as the postal service gets funny about that sort of thing, but a few over-enthusiastic readers do like to send her their best cuttings.

Mistress Iris, of course. But you knew that. Pervert.

They also serve, who only scurry and cringe.

In today’s cut-throat business world, any opportunity for effective networking should be taken up. The other businessman featured here was due to go to Davos but his PA messed up and booked him in OWK instead. Poor thing, she must have felt awful about her mistake.

Beauty is power; a smile is its sword

The back is mostly devoted to warnings about how ugly the front is. But fortunately it’s quite hard to read through all the welts.

Those early feminist books were groundbreaking, but modern female supremacist thinking, with its emphasis on sexual inequality and the importance of women’s autonomy over their boys’ bodies, has moved on.

Their corporate philosophy is that every boy can progress to the absolute limit of his potential, with the right guidance and incentives.

And some sexists think that boys are better at quantitative skills than girls! I’d like to see them beat her at this game.

She doesn’t mind being stopped in the street by admirers. She’s even got a little ‘E’ mini branding iron and is only too happy to heat it up with a lighter, for an autograph.

And never brought to mind?

Another year dawns, full of hope and denial. Wishing all my male readers a humiliating and unpleasant year, in which your desires, dreams and fingertips are all crushed beneath an elegant boot.

No doubt, many of you printed off and proudly hung up last year’s CtD calendar, featuring the moist and pungent girls of our sister publication, Armpit Fetishist Monthly. Slightly pointlessly, because it didn’t actually have any dates on it, but no one ever said males were smart, right?

This year’s calendar is equally pointless, to match your pointless lives. It’s a chastity calendar, or chastendar as no one likes to say, in which the absence of any dates allows you all to avoid the misery of noticing that she has not circled one single day in red. Maybe one day she will? Anyway: another year… 365 days… more than thirty-one million seconds, I understand. Enjoy watching them tick by…

Boxing stupid

Yes, it’s Boxing Day. A day I have come to realise is culturally specific to the UK and a few other places that are a bit like the UK, but not as damp and with fewer bat-tunnels. It’s one of those phrases that non-British people often fail to understand, like ‘having a fag in the back alley’ (you can also be a fag, for an older boy at boarding school, of course); or making sure ‘your child always has a rubber in his schoolbag’, as the teachers don’t provide them, or ‘letting some woman piss in your ring-gagged mouth’, which is just an idiomatic way of saying you’ll take her advice (“Oh, I don’t know which movie to go and see, darling: just ring-gag my jaw wide open and you can piss in my mouth, OK?”)*

Anyway, traditionally a day for tidying up after the excesses of the day before, although some people are more active: many hunts go out on Boxing Day, for example, with whips cracking and horns blaring as they pursure their terrified quarry across the fields, and some hardy souls even have a tradition of jumping naked into the sea, here in Britain on one of the coldest days of the year. My SO has very thoughtfully signed me up for all three of these festive activities, so I’ve no time for a themed post, just the usual dross.

Forget Kurt. Well… don’t forget him, obviously: he still needs his laundy done and his appartment cleaned. But the important thing is that your chastity regime should be right for *you* and that’s what she’s focused on.

Wow, tough situation! Thank goodness she’s there for him.

Looks like babe brought a pineapple, though, and I’m sure there are some bits of that that could be put to good use.

She was a little disappointed that Dr Taylor insisted on anesthetising you for the procedure, but there’ll be plenty of time later, when you’ll have the feeling restored in all of the bits of your body that remain attached.

I booked a ‘mean date’ session with a sex worker and she didn’t even show up! Wonderful. It’s so rare for someone just to ‘get me’ like that.

Some men find it hard to adapt to a female supremacist work environment, but it’s actually very straightforward as long as you just follow a few simple rules – or a lot of complicated rules, if that’s what she prefers.

* All right, I made that last one up. I make a lot of stuff up, here. But you should try it, I mean you never know, right? And there are never any good movies around, just after Christmas, so it’s good to find alternative ways of entertaining yourselves.

They also serve, who only wait and wait…

In other respects, the two are very similar – the tubes are almost exactly the same size, for instance. Also, my SO likes to grab hold of what’s below the bottom of the tube and twist sharply.

Genital burns can be quite tricky to deal with. I actually help out, by volunteering (OK, ‘Someone’ volunteers me) once a month to let our local female first responders practice treating nasty burns to my penis and balls. I like to feel I’m (OK, She’s) giving something back.

He certainly doesn’t – it was touch and go last time. But that’s his thing, so he keeps making the bookings.

I always think thanks are reward enough. Or mockery and contempt, as I enjoy those too.

You might imagine it’s hard to survive seven gunshots, but with careful aim you should survive long enough to make it worthwhile for her.

It’s not a rhetorical question, as so many questions in the captions here are. The delightfully unsmiling Ms Venten does genuinely want to know what you think, so she can decide whether your opinions as well as your behaviour need to be sorted out.

Denial and service

In contrast, I think you’ll agree you do need the heavy strap. Quite frequently.

Treasure doesn’t usually believe in animals being kept in cages. But she’s prepared to make an exception.

Most sex workers lost their livelihoods when the Femsuprem government banned males from possessing money, but dominatrices transitioned to the new female-led economy just fine.

This blog favours males leading unhappy abnormal lives, and the women who are prepared to make that happen for us.

Kitten likes cars, but when they get old and a bit worn you need new ones – like clothes and pay-pigs.

The very best authority

As my SO likes to say, ‘It’s not hurting enough unless it’s hurting too much.’ Bless her.

One of the toppings will be sprayed on quite warm, which should help make the frozen pizza a lot easier to bite through.

The firm has invested heavily to try to make its workforce as productive as possible: decent coffee, gym and chill-out spaces for the female employees and a really well-resourced office disciplinary team for the males.

I hope he’ll have the sense tomorrow to thank her properly for letting him spend the night on her lovely concrete floor. Some men can be so thoughtless.

Funny how women want to test the chastity belts. I mean, mine has never bent even slightly under pressure of the very hardest erection, so it hardly seems necessary. Arguably, I might conclude it’s a bit over-engineered, but arguing’s not permitted.

You have placed a lock around my heart

NB: still having some problems with the spam filter on comments. It has somehow become much stricter and while this blog generally celebrates extremes of strictness, this does seem to be overly restrictive (I can tell it’s not just that no one is speaking to me, because the small proportion of actual scummy spam that usually gets through has gone to zero). I have tried changing the settings and I might do more of that, but the most important thing if you are blocked is to request access, then try again about a day later, as your IP address should then be on the allow list.

There’s always a next month. Just try to remember that.

Actually, the boyfriend’s non-exclusive as Stumpy’s having much more success attracting sex partners than he ever had before he was mounted on a trolley – the sign encouraging punters to use him in any way they like probably helps.

Maybe she can do an in-kind exchange thing. He gives her a discount on the car and in return she takes his money and ignores him. If you have a valuable, marketable skill, you should use it wherever possible.

She’s bad with names. She forgot yours years ago.

She does occasionally feel mean, it’s true.

The lovely Maya Sin, who once made me memorise a French poem while tied hand and foot. She now appears to have retired so no link for you, perves!

Best sushi-eating scene in cinematic history is here.

A woman scorning

with hellish fury…

NB: I believe there are still some problems with the antivirus thing preventing people posting comments. Obviously the fault of a male somewhere and I hope he gets his comeuppance. If you request access, I will approve and then your IP address goes on an approved list and you should be OK.