Category: caption

Pitiful, really

…but it’s all I’ve got.

I once dated a girl who said she wanted me to be a stallion in the bedroom.  So I got all kitted up, you know in reins and harness, and when she came into the room I handed her spurs and the riding whip and she just screamed, slapped me round the face and left. How humiliating. Happy days…

Former boyfriends… bane of my life.

The first time a domme gave me a golden shower and ordered me to lick it up, She asked me what the taste was like.  I replied ‘tart’ and things got very painful, very quickly.   (Non-British readers won’t get that: don’t worry about it, move on).

I took a personality test once and scored a perfect zero.

She’s lying because she knows I like the contempt.  Really, she has to keep swigging at that bottle to take her mind off the hot action in front of her.  Otherwise she’d be overpowered with lust, at the sight of an overweight middle-aged sub, desperately jerking away on the floor by her boots.  Women just can’t resist that kind of thing.


Servility costs nothing

(although finding someone to whom to be servile can run to several hundred pounds an hour, in my experience)


This is something many men still have to learn.  Just because a woman chooses to wear something sexy, you can’t assume she’s doing so for your pleasure.

Any fundamentalist religious types who don’t believe in female supremacy might care to meditate on why the Divine Being provided males with testicles in such a handy container, and then wired them stright into the pain centres.  Don’t you think She’s given us a bit of a clue, there?

Mis-statement I’d like to forget?

One day he’s going to have to give up the thing that matters most to him. Her.

Yeah, the usual order.


Simply divine, darling





It’s always such a relief when finally the boxes are all unpacked, there’s a chain the right length in each room, all the pillories and cages have been assembled and you can get back to ordinary married life, for goodness sake.

She’s always taken roleplay very seriously. They tried medical fetish play once and it didn’t turn out well.

Making a decision of my own free will, to do exactly whatever she has told me, immediately, is the secret to a happy life I find.
Oh, you’ve already promised to honour and obey him, so adding love to the mix doesn’t change much.

The truth will not set you free.


Suitable treatment

Ah… the second childhood. I’m looking forward to that.

(sorry)

Therapy can be painful.

Quite a therapeutic theme today.  Using boys for anger management makes a lot of sense: it can work off a lot of tension and no one who matters gets hurt.

Little does she know I’m a humiliation freak as well as a service-oriented submissive, so being despised is just all part of the fun!



Hmmm… just noticed that my favourite Tumblr cuandolasmujeresmanden has just disappeared.  Damn! I know there’s about a billion femdom image reposting Tumblrs but cuando somehow just managed precisely to match my own perverted tastes .  And only posted high quality pictures too.  First ‘Femdom Times’ goes into hibernation for ever and now this.  Does Tumblr close down ‘adult’ blogs?  I must say, I can’t quite see the point, given that there’d still be 999,999,999 of them left.

Grrrr….   If anyone has a particular recommendation feel free to share it in the comments.  No blogs with nekkid women, granny porn or really icky things being done to men’s genitals and shown in close-up please.  Just good healthy bondage and discipline.  And humiliation, contempt and cruelty.

Deliver us from freedom

 

It’s a small town, so the walk of shame afterwards will only take you 15 minutes or so.

I had a very traditional upbringing – strict discipline, cold showers, that kind of thing.  It cost about £450 but it was worth every penny and I’m going back in a few weeks for another one.

Goodness, if you can’t trust your cleaner with that sort of trivial responsibility, why would you even let her into the house?
Ahhh male doms.  I think male doms are just great, in their proper place.



Perhaps you’d better approach the bench.


That’s what she said

There’s a lot of give and take in their relationship, as you can see.







That one’s called ‘the tickler’.  Come on – arms up to the shackles – this is going to be fun!











Men’s
libbers just need to spend more time reflecting quietly on how lucky
they are to be living in a female-led society, if you ask me. In the
corner, with a well-smacked bottom, preferably.
Just lick something at random – quickly!
With thanks to Alex Bragin for the translation.





There’s a hand gesture for ‘go away’ as well. Pray she never uses it.


Ordered relationship

According to Wikipedia’s page on Order Theory: “In other contexts, orders may capture notions of containment.”  Well, that’s certainly true.  There are several types of orders, if I understand correctly, among which ‘strict ordering’ is clearly the best.

Oh, I think we know what Natasha’s going to say. She’s been breaking boys’ legs since she was a teenager.

Sounds like a lot of fun. Get to work!

If everything not OK, there might be some bureaucratic formalities to go through, at the male holding centre.

You have something you’d rather spend 60% of your income on, than the divine Lady Sophia Black?
 Awww no… I went to put in a link but her website has shut down and she is protecting her tweets.  I hope Lady Sophia hasn’t retired from the scene.  She’s wonderful.

She’s gone to all that trouble. The least you can do is suffer for her, hmm?


Chain keep us together, running in the shadow

Yes, it’s another link to a music video with only the most spurious and tangential connection – if any – to the theme of this blog.  
 
That theme being, obviously, this:

He even scratched in the corner his tally of how many there are.  But you could wipe that off if you don’t want spoilers.

He’s going to have ever such a clean mouth. And a very respectful attitude too.

Hmmm. Looks like you’re gettig that date rape after all!

Oh, it doesn’t matter.  Mouth and anus – they’re just two ends of the same tube. As my SO likes to point out: shit comes out of both and ocasionally needs to be shoved into both too, so why worry?

Awww.  Sweet.


Love hurts

…in all sorts of unexpected ways. But today is the day for celebrating love, harking all the way back to St Valentine himself who found love while incarcerated behind the bars of a prison cell, before being tortured to death.  He remains an inspiration to us all.

You can’t run away from love.




She’s working hard for this marriage.  Maxim and Sven are probably going to be giving it their all too. So what about you?






Just once.






Love can also express itself through pain, terror, panic – especially when instruments of torture are involved.  It’s just part of how it feels, when it’s real, you know?




I had a friend who wanted to give his SO the ultimate gift, and secretly commissioned a designer leather firm to sort it out. Sadly, there was a mix-up and he ended up as about a fifth of a matching armchair and sofa set that was sold to some billionaire in Qatar with more money than taste. But she would have been quite touched by the gesture, had she ever known about it.
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