A few adverts I have come across*, while tidying my SO’s magazines.
* [Memo to self: put footnote down here with some witty innuendo about ‘come across’]
The power of persuasion
Stories and pictures themed around female domination and male subjugation and servitude. Unsuitable for children, for alpha males, for hard-core practitioners with an interest in the politics of bdsm and the mechanics of complicated rope work. Of interest to perverts like me, basically.
Dog Latin
I would render that sentiment as “Sine dolori, nihil lucri.” Ablative case plus genitive of partition etc. But I suppose your version is snappier.
My old prep-school Latin teacher was very fond of the words of Seneca: “ignis aurum probat, miseria fortes viros” – fire tests gold as misery forges men.
I was always top of the class in Latin, and even dabbled in Ancient Greek. With hindsight, I might have been better served neglecting my studies. A punitive spanking from Miss Walmsley would have been a memory to treasure.
Vincit qui patitur
PP
Dog Latin assisted by Google… I did latin at school, even got an O level but it was my worst subject and I have forgotten everything except the very first sentences of Ecce Romani. But Google obviously swotted away at its primer. To be fair, the original English for that fine educational establishment’s motto – no pain, no gain – isn’t particularly grammatical either.
I never had the slightest hankering to go over the lap of any of the rather seedy men who taught me Latin, although rumour at the school persistently suggested that at least one of them would have been quite keen to try that and this wasn’t seen as a big deal, just something to be aware of. O tempora, o mores!
Gloria Anna soli
S
Have you ever had such an intense and immediate autonomic reaction to the sight of a certain woman that you grab the phone book and start searching for a castration clinic?
Servitor, I guess your answer is yes, but for anybody else maybe Dutch speed skater Jutta Leerdam will make you feel the same way I feel:
What a delightful lady, shorty. How ever do you manage to find such lovelies… oh yes, perving in front of the TV, I expect.
I wonder whether, if the male were fixed into just the right position, a speed skater with the skill and power and (I’m hoping) firm and unyielding attitude of juffrouw Jutta, wouldn’t even need the services of the clinic, but could simply skate her way to triumph, so to speak?
Best wishes
S
Very possible. I think it may call for experimentation… Now if I can just find a contact for her manager…
We’d also need a source of funding. Do you have a contact with Lady Serena? On second thought, that may not be so well advised…
P.S. As for my own psychology, I think there is a part of my brain that, confronted with incontrovertible evidence that I am in the presence of a Goddess, comes to the parsimonious conclusion: ‘Oh, in that case, I suppose I’m a eunuch!’
Not well advised? I don’t see why not, shorty. Serena’s only to happy to fund experiments of this nature, so I really can’t see any downside. You certainly don’t need to worry that things might get a little messy – Serena has the proper scientific attitude to just keep trying something, even if it goes wrong a few times on the way. And she’s a perfectionist: for example, a few years back she wanted to brand a former boyfriend of Alice’s, as a surprise for her birthday, so she practiced for days, branding every inch of the skins of at least twelve other males to get the depth and the duration of the brand just right before doing it for real. She understands you can’t make an omelette without breaking eggs and you can’t make testicle bake without gelding a few males. In this case, obviously, castrating someone using ice skates, on the feet of a champion skater moving at over thirty miles an hour, is going to be a bit tricky and there’ll be a few little mishaps on the way, but Serena’s not going to worry about that, so neither should you.
As for eunuchery, you should go with whatever feels right for you, I’d say, or feels right to any passing female who might take a view on the matter.
Best wishes
S