shoes – Contemplating the divine

You made the rules and you could not see

…y ou made a life out of hurting me.

Males always have disgusting things in mind. It’s not their fault (but that’s no reason to let them off a beating for it) – they *are* disgusting.

Contrary to the stereotype about women’s sexual preferences, findommes tend to want to skip the foreplay of little teasing gifts and just get straight into deep penetration of their partners’ bank accounts.

She’s going to be hanging around in lingerie a lot from now on. It’s just her making sure, to show how she feels about you.

I was about to ask whether there’s anything worse than having a lovely pair of shoes when your chain’s *just* too short for your lips to reach them… but there are worse things, obviously. Many, many worse things – as my SO has been kind enough to teach me, over the years.

This could explain some of the apparently random and heartless decisions global companies have taken in recent years, actually. Maybe I’ll write something for the Harvard Business Review.

Must be nice for Kate and her boy, being ‘out’. I’ve had to read up about epilepsy, because that’s our cover story if anyone ever sees me writhing around on the floor gasping incoherently after saying the wrong thing to my SO (or looking like I might be about to). Still, I suppose that’s a small price to pay for living the fantasy in reality.

A cure for idleness

Or several cures, even, often bookable by the hour.

Don’t worry, she’ll listen carefully to your views on the matter, as you gasp them out. Or you can leave it until after and tell her while sobbing.

I’m sure Sylvie will be fine, as long as you don’t do or say anything annoying during the three weeks she has you. What’s that you say? You’re *male*? Hmm… OK, I can see that could be a problem.

Another nice lady, but make sure you ask her politely or she might get cross.

They also serve, who only kneel and pay.

They do accept femsuprem-supporting boys as ‘associate members’ but if you already belong to a full member, that won’t be necessary.

He could go along to the next meeting of his teachers’ union. Trouble is, so might she and some of her friends.

This lady, although seen only from behind, is the stunningly beautiful but (it seems) essentially uncontactable Lady Tamara Kenworthy. Fairer maiden never gymslip wore.*

*Except possibly this one. Ah well, dreaming is free.

A woman’s right to choose

It’s very important, in so many areas of life.

That’s so unfair! I have *specific* unfulfilled perverted desires. A great many of them, covering a wide range of activities, true, but I know what I like and I know I’m not allowed it.

She mostly doesn’t mind him being small. The first time she tried kneeing him in the balls, she had to crouch down, but then she discovered she could easily lift him up off the ground and just hold him squirming there while kneeing him repeatedly, so they got over that difficulty.

Makes a change from being put out in the kennel.

It’s silly to pay for public humiliation play when you can get it for free from almost any girl by going up to her and trying a chat-up line.

Apparently theatres love booking them because there’s always a queue of male ‘groupies’ at the stage door, eager to come in and tidy and clean everything up after the post-show party.

How exciting – and unexpected – to imagine Scarlett watching a movie all about you! Hope she enjoys it… I’m sure she will; her body guard knows what she likes and he’s done this before.

The lovely Maîtresse Blanche, there, who applies her treatments in a pretty little town near Fontainebleu outside Paris. I have been in that position, presumably in that very chair, and I was coping… OK with it all, until she discovered I was ticklish. But she coped very well with my not coping.

If you’re lucky she might let you have a longer ankle chain. But I wouldn’t bet on it.

Kitten’s going to think *really hard* about that.

When the belle strikes

She’s perfect, so is it so unreasonable for her to expect perfection around her?

She’s quite unsentimental about these things. Just as well, because her boys don’t usually last long.

The self-defense training can actually be worked into the pole-dancing routine, but they’d need several new submissives every night, so they only do that on special occasions.

Strangely, once the penitance she has in mind is complete, you’ll actually still be in a state of mortal sin – more so, if anything. So you’d better go straight to confession and it can all start again.

Conversations about money in relationships can be very uncomfortable. Many couples find it easier never to discuss money – my SO certainly never allows the topic to come up.

Fascinatrices

Trust is important in marriage, but not as important as discipline. She’d like to trust you, but like any caring wife she just wants to make quite sure.

She doesn’t know much about horses. You know, she didn’t even realise you don’t have to peel carrots before you give them to a horse? So someone spent over an hour peeling carrots… and then there were all the scrapings to be eaten up off the ground. All in all, it’s fair to say this is not what he expected when he paid a domme to come out to his place in the country… which is probably why he tipped her double and emailed her the very next day requesting another session.

Just after this picture was taken, he made the mistake of replying that in that case he would be happy to help out by doing half of the spanking. This did not go down well, but after a very long discussion their marriage emerged stronger than ever.

Fair enough to pay extra for an orgasm but I’ve heard there are some fake dommes who charge extra for simple things that really ought to be included in the up-front tribute, like being untied, having the beating stop or just the plastic bag removed from over your head. It’s a rather shady practice, in my view.

The most important thing for her to realise is that she’s in control.

I find it hard to look at her without suffering an Anya-ism. Well, “suffering” isn’t really the right word.

Women’s men

It took a while for me to get used to our D/S dynamic in restaurants. I used to get embarassed at being so publicly submissive – even over what are actually practical and necessary things like, for example, my SO requesting that my food be given a quick whizz in the liquidiser so it can more easily pass through my feeding funnel. But you soon realise that the waitresses just don’t care: they’ve got jobs to do, after all.

I can do some quite spectacular things with it. Just not while having sex. Or at least, spectacular things have occasionally been done to it, by mischievous and highly creative people.

She has a keenly attuned sense of what your needs really are.

She’s got a little whip on which each of the thongs is studded with diamonds cut into sharp little points. Some might think that’s overdoing it, but she thinks it and the marks that it leaves are pretty and as long as she likes it, really who is to question her taste? Not me, certainly.

Form an orderly queue by the stage door…. Hey! I said an *orderly* queue! Look, if you can’t even follow simple instructions, she’s hardly likely to …

The real religion of the world comes from women much more than from men – from mothers most of all, who carry the key of our souls in their bosoms.

Yes, it’s the day* to celebrate mothers. Loving, nurturing and kind to their offspring, brutally savage and eternally contemptuous of their sons-in-law. The latter relationship is more this blog’s focus, for obvious reasons.

Many subs who get off on the idea of punishment, not to mention being humiliated and treated with contempt, don’t realise how much more effectively those can be provided by a woman of more advanced years, who has had longer to hone her opinions and approach towards the male sex.

She has an excellent reason: she dislikes you intensely.

Oh don’t read things into the captions that aren’t there! Of course she didn’t murder him! He died of nervous exhaustion, poor chap.

Obviously you shouldn’t have to pay full session rates, just for cleaning out her Mum’s garage. Ask for a 40% discount, at least – and don’t settle for less than 5%.

It’s good that mothers and daughters phone each other so frequently.

Don’t worry, she’s not going to be a burden. In fact, she can help a lot with the housework: checking all the tasks have been done satisfactorily, drawing up schedules and providing advice and encouragement wherever needed.

* Some of you might be wondering why we’re doing this today, when everyone knows Mothers’ Day is in May? If so, it’s probably because you’re American and have forgotten there are what we call ‘other places’ in the world, and some of those don’t do things in the same way you do. Don’t worry, it’s an easy mistake to make, especially if you’re working with the disadvantage of only having a male brain. Try taking a trip somewhere ‘else’ to broaden your horizons – I hear the Gulf of Mexico is nice at this time of year.

That’s what she said

Don’t make her say it twice.

I’m sure Julie won’t mind at all but it’s always polite to ask.

My SO likes to play this game and would you believe it, I’ve lost 23 times in a row. What are the odds?* I would say I’m very unlucky but I’m so lucky to be married to such a wonderful lady, that would be churlish.

* Just over one in ten million. “Do the maths” – as a Governess I used to visit used to say – “then bend over the punishment bench so I can do the marking”.

Many relationships that end in divorce could actually be saved if only the woman were prepared to make her husband do the work.

There’s usually a little crowd of embarassed-looking beta-boys waiting outside that club, so you can pass the time in awkward chats with them. You can bond over lucky you all are to have the opportunity perhaps to be useful to your goddesses, boyfriend jealousy issues, how you deal with chafing from your chastity belts and all that kind of subbie stuff. As long as she’s given permission, obviously.

The divine Mistress Akella, there.

It’s about time an A-list star called out these creepy publications that use images of actresses without permission, to titillate their sad and perverted readership. This blog applauds Ms Scarlett’s courage in speaking out.

Every man has a wild beast within him

But fortunately these days, more and more women are skilled in trapping and subduing these feral creatures and in the training techniques needed for domestication.