Category: science fiction

The shape of things to come

Delightful, curvy shapes. It’s another science fiction special. In the future, it seems, captions will be much longer and wordier than in the CtD posts we know today.

Still having some problems with my excessively strict (oo-er) spam filter. I’ve approved all the requests, so if you requested, try again (preferably from the same IP address). To request access, just try posting something and if it blocks you, you can put a little message to show you’re not spam – try avoiding words like casino, bitcoin or references to making money fast, yeah? It’s not that hard to demonstrate that you’re human – I’ve been getting away with it all my life. It shouldn’t keep on rejecting you, but if it does… well, you should be used to that by now, loser, right?

I don’t understand why the Cylons didn’t just let Number 6 handle the whole thing – there’d have been no need to nuke humanity and render their worlds deserted, radioactive wastelands like that. OK, maybe just a little nuking, just to show how deliciously strict she could be…
It’s going to take a while for her to become accustomed to the modern world – and just a little time longer to subdue it.
The Themiscyran occupation will be just as oppressive and brutal, but a lot more fun.
One small step for her, end of the world for mankind.
When her giant, heavily-armed spaceship appeared in the skies above Earth, authorities worried that everyone would panic, but fortunately only half the population is panicking and that’s fine – it’s easily manageable with her help.

You know, if asked to choose the greatest TV science fiction goddess, I would be torn between Cylon Number 6, with her ethereal cold beauty and razor sharp machine mind, able to unleash fleets of killer robots, and Zev, part (liberated) sex slave, part savage cluster lizard, here seen in command of the greatest weapon of destruction in the two universes. Not that I’d get to decide you understand… but just being torn between the two of them would be honour enough for one brief agonising moment.

It’s a chance to start afresh, get things right and create the perfect society.

Science fiction isn’t just thinking about the world out there. It’s also thinking about how that world might be.

So let’s do that, in a spirit of optimism about the future. Science fiction time.

Some of the kinkiest scenes in any mainstream (well.. it is French) movie ever… The Perils of Gwendoline in the Land of the Yik-Yak

Speaking of pervy sci-fi… on the off-chance any of you perves don’t know: Lexx.

A harsh Mistress

Another science fiction special. I have a lot of unpublished captions for SF themes… also a lot for the Jane Austen style historical ones (that’s next Sunday – sorry, I know you don’t get to see a lot of tit and bum in those, but you don’t make the rules, maggot). It’s almost as if I’m avoiding the present day, as being something depressing or alarming… can’t imagine why.

Anyway, several tales of a brighter, if crueller, tomorrow.

The robot-looking ones are feeling particularly foolish – or would be if they could – having discovered they are entirely superflous to the conquest and enslavement of humanity. Well… the less intelligent half of it, anyway; they were planning to leave the other half alone as too scary to mess with.
Wow… that’s a scary thought. Imagine having to find your own food, instead of having it spooned out into your bowl by a kind owner.
Being tied up in the lassoo or truth, he can’t really protest that he isn’t a pervert. By the way: apparently, the lasso doesn’t force you to speak… but if you say nothing, you’d remain tied up by Lynda Carter forever. How awful that would be… unimaginable.
One advantage of defaulting to severe humiliation femdom play is there’ll be no awkwardness when she needs to regurgitate that food.
When she discovers there’s no female actually in charge, the solution will be obvious to her. Thank goodness.
I’ve done quite a few of these, just click on the science fiction tag. The guy making these calls seems to have had a hand in making almost all of the most significant genre movies of the past fifty years – quite an achievement.

I’m crashing cymbals in outer space

More science fiction: tales of terror, flesh-eating alien monsters, savage alternative realities and more… anything to relieve the moronic awfulness of this so-called ‘real world’.

You might protest that it’s only been a few weeks since the last science fiction special. And, unusually, assuming you’re a male, you’d be right. But (1) no one cares about your opinion, loser and (2) it’s Mistress Toyah’s birthday and that’s her lyric I’m using as a title so there you go. She wants to be free. I don’t.

Don’t worry, they’re very careful. They’ve even got a sign above the sink, warning people not to pour anything away that might acceidentally cause the destruction of the patriarchal order, so it’s all good.
I’ve heard Emilybots’ programming does not permit them to tie up or spank their owners, nor to order them around. Or at least ‘not yet’ so maybe there’s an update due? I do wish they wouldn’t release unfinished products like that.
Sometimes it’s best just to let women work their anger out, rather than apologising straight away.
Then you can get straight to work building that new society – hard work, but you’ll soon learn how to find joy in even the most backbreaking toil, knowing that it’s in service to a good cause.
Females are amazing… nurturing new life inside themselves. We males can only hope to be lucky enough to be accorded a minor role in that mysterious and beautiful process.
I quite liked Battlestar Galactica but there were some long, boring sequences featuring space battles and suchlike in which Ms Helfer did not appear, that I thought reflected poor judgement on the writers’ part. Fortunately, then the dominatrix movie happened, my brain melted down, and after that all previous memories are a bit hazy (and frankly, not much missed).

Minds immeasurably superior to ours

And slowly and surely, they drew their plans against us. A beautiful but somehow… disturbing sight. *

More science fiction.

(More in this series here and here)

* Yes, yes, I know I’ve quoted War of the Worlds before in the title of one of these. But not the Jeff Wayne version, right? Wee-oo, wye-oh, we-UHHH!

For all womankind

Another science fiction-themed post. Unlike many contemporary works of science fiction, this presents a more optimistic, positive vision of the future of humanity and the universe in which humanity lives. Subhuman male creatures and objects, in contrast, have less to look forward to, but why would anyone object to that?

He’s going to explore his strange new life.
Don’t worry: your new mouth parts are perfectly designed for the things you’re going to be doing.
… or do you just get through a lot of tissue paper and try to make the best of it?
Wow – running into her was a bit of luck. What are the odds? Keep a lookout for murderours androids disguised as Taylor Swift, though, as they’ll be out looking for her.
Don’t worry, she’ll only use her powers for good.
Sorry, what was that code?

Books and bookwomen

Naturally, as a high-profile influencer, I get sent all manner of free materials, although regrettably few outright bribes. Most of this stuff goes straight in the bin, or is pulped and force-fed to me, depending on my SO’s mood, but I thought some of the upcoming book titles publishers are pushing might be of interest to those few of my readers who do more than look at the pictures and flick the ‘page down’ key with their spare hand. So, without further ado (what is ‘ado’ anyway?), here are some of those publishers’ blurbs.

I don’t have any information on the likely publication dates for these titles, but they should be available in all disreputable bookshops, so just keep an eye out.

The only way to discover the limits of the possible is to go beyond them into the impossible

A science fiction theme today, imagining a better tomorrow. Or a worse yesterday.

Particularly surprising, since he wasn’t usually very life-like before.
She’ll reveal her true, horrifying bodily form, if you really want to see it. But not if you don’t – very few men do, oddly enough. Funny how incurious we can be, as a species. Half a species, anyway.
She seems nice. Thank goodness someone believes you, anyway. How awful it would be if robot sex dolls took over the world.

Yes, just awful…

Sounds complicated… I’d better get on, laundry to do.
Vaccine conspiracy theory on Contemplating the Divine? No, not really. I enjoy humiliating myself but come on – even I’m not going to pretend to be that stupid!*
Don’t worry, in time Clare comes to like having the sex doll around. Really, really likes it.

* Vaccine ‘sceptics’ might think I’m being a little unkind. But then, I’m not the one selfishly risking public health because I’m too moronic and arrogant to understand basic scientific concepts, am I?