Category: caption

Subordinate clauses

It’s pay to play. Except when it’s ‘don’t you dare play but pay anyway’.
There were great hopes for the ‘living crash test dummy’ programme, when it was set up, but it turned out to provide data of limited medical usefulness in studying brain damage because of course by female standards, males’ brains are already damaged.
Just like my wedding night… except my blushing bride wasn’t actually in the same room as me.
Thank goodness it’s only a hypothetical question. I don’t object in principle, but can’t she see I’m busy with the ironing?
Music hath charms.
Oh… I remember this occasion. Such a bad time to sneeze.

Denial and service

In contrast, I think you’ll agree you do need the heavy strap. Quite frequently.
The customer is always wrong.
Treasure doesn’t usually believe in animals being kept in cages. But she’s prepared to make an exception.
Most sex workers lost their livelihoods when the Femsuprem government banned males from possessing money, but dominatrices transitioned to the new female-led economy just fine.
This blog favours males leading unhappy abnormal lives, and the women who are prepared to make that happen for us.
Kitten likes cars, but when they get old and a bit worn you need new ones – like clothes and pay-pigs.

The Fashionable Frown

Rather a narrow focus to today’s ‘special’ (you have noticed that Sunday’s posts are always specials, right? Course you have). Anyway, this is just to celebrate my discovery of a lovely young lady fashion model called Olivia Vinten. Unlike many other models, Ms Vinten does not seem to believe in smiling for the camera, preferring instead a pursed-lips look that to my mind expresses contempt, outrage or even barely repressed fury. All of these are delightful emotions for females to hold – entirely understandably when confronted by the exasperating and incompetent lesser sex – so she is today’s celebrated goddess and will feature again in future. She looks so cross… and regular ‘readers’ will know I have a soft and tender spot for women looking cross.

Don’t get me wrong – I don’t object to women smiling. For one thing, I’m not allowed to express negative opinions about anything a female does, for another there is certainly a place for a mocking or patronising smile in our little world. But it’s so refershing to see a beautiful young model expressing her real feelings, that today is a smile-free post.

I haven’t cherry-picked the images by the way. Just try typing ‘Olivia Vinten’ in your favourite anonymised search engine and you might see at most one or two half-smiles, amid a display of fabulous feminine frowniness.

I want a girl with a long….

…long jacket!

I’m pretty sure I’ve featured this video before but some things are worth more than others and Emma Peel is priceless. Any benighted youngish ‘readers’ who think that the Avengers are superheroes or that Diana Rigg is mainly known for playing Lady Olenna Tyrell might want to educate themselves, or submit to someone who will educate them properly.

Post is (regrettably) unrelated as I just don’t have captioned images of the divine Ms Rigg. Maybe I should.

I want a girl with a mind like a diamond.

Relationships are based on give and take. Like, how about this time you do what she wants without question or complaint and then on another occasion, maybe it’ll be her turn to decide what you do, and so on.

Who uses a machete to cut through red tape

He’s a regular customer – has a loyalty card. But then they take disloyalty rather badly, so it’s best to be loyal.

She’s touring the facility and picking up slack

Many of her slaves would dispute the idea that her dog is obedient – but then they have high standards of obedience. Obviously, the dog gets a bit more latitude to interpret her commands than they do.

I want a girl with uninterrupted prosperity

Hmmm. $8000 might sound a lot, but with the cost of medical care in the US, you might not come out much ahead. Better check what it is she actually wants.

I want a girl who knows what’s best

I want a girl with shoes that cut, and eyes that burn like cigarettes

In the event, Mistress didn’t see a leopard (maybe they don’t eat maggots?) but she did see a pack of hyenas making a kill and that was pretty special, so she was happy enough.

Oh my goodness, Lady Sophia Black was a wonderful, wonderful domme….

The very best authority

As my SO likes to say, ‘It’s not hurting enough unless it’s hurting too much.’ Bless her.
One of the toppings will be sprayed on quite warm, which should help make the frozen pizza a lot easier to bite through.
The firm has invested heavily to try to make its workforce as productive as possible: decent coffee, gym and chill-out spaces for the female employees and a really well-resourced office disciplinary team for the males.
I hope he’ll have the sense tomorrow to thank her properly for letting him spend the night on her lovely concrete floor. Some men can be so thoughtless.
Funny how women want to test the chastity belts. I mean, mine has never bent even slightly under pressure of the very hardest erection, so it hardly seems necessary. Arguably, I might conclude it’s a bit over-engineered, but arguing’s not permitted.
Oh to be held in her tight embrace…

The shape of things to come

Delightful, curvy shapes. It’s another science fiction special. In the future, it seems, captions will be much longer and wordier than in the CtD posts we know today.

Still having some problems with my excessively strict (oo-er) spam filter. I’ve approved all the requests, so if you requested, try again (preferably from the same IP address). To request access, just try posting something and if it blocks you, you can put a little message to show you’re not spam – try avoiding words like casino, bitcoin or references to making money fast, yeah? It’s not that hard to demonstrate that you’re human – I’ve been getting away with it all my life. It shouldn’t keep on rejecting you, but if it does… well, you should be used to that by now, loser, right?

I don’t understand why the Cylons didn’t just let Number 6 handle the whole thing – there’d have been no need to nuke humanity and render their worlds deserted, radioactive wastelands like that. OK, maybe just a little nuking, just to show how deliciously strict she could be…
It’s going to take a while for her to become accustomed to the modern world – and just a little time longer to subdue it.
The Themiscyran occupation will be just as oppressive and brutal, but a lot more fun.
One small step for her, end of the world for mankind.
When her giant, heavily-armed spaceship appeared in the skies above Earth, authorities worried that everyone would panic, but fortunately only half the population is panicking and that’s fine – it’s easily manageable with her help.

You know, if asked to choose the greatest TV science fiction goddess, I would be torn between Cylon Number 6, with her ethereal cold beauty and razor sharp machine mind, able to unleash fleets of killer robots, and Zev, part (liberated) sex slave, part savage cluster lizard, here seen in command of the greatest weapon of destruction in the two universes. Not that I’d get to decide you understand… but just being torn between the two of them would be honour enough for one brief agonising moment.

It’s a chance to start afresh, get things right and create the perfect society.

Inferior angles

She needs to be able to trust you’ll always do as you’re told and for your part, you can trust her never to make you do anything she doesn’t want you to do, OK?
It’s a matter of priorities. Would you rather participate in ninety minutes of male shouting about some silly thing getting kicked around or go and watch the football?
It can be hard to find good masturbation gloves. My SO’s needed a new pair for months, but she can’t seem to find any she likes enough to buy. It must be very frustrating for her.
Dommes can get funny about dressing up as nazis. I mean, it’s just a bit of sexy cosplay, right? I asked one once – oh… what was her name? Mistress Hannah, was it? Or Esther or Miriam… one of those pretty names. Anyway, she flat-out refused and what’s worse, she didn’t at all respect the pain limits we’d agreed, which I think is very unprofessional.
Rule 3 is a wonderful rule. I often have the joy and privilege of having it imposed upon me.
It starts to get dark really early this time of year.

Managing directrices

Their ‘at your desk’ service is very popular. Alternatively, they can just take control of your male employees remotely and sort the problem out that way, but most of their users prefer to watch them work in person.
Well… OK. Sounds pretty standard to me. Do they have good wi fi?
He hasn’t been told himself yet, so I expect he’s eager to hear your guesses.

The wonderful, clever and lovely Tiffany Naylor, who nayled me good and proper a few years back. I still have the warm glow.

There’s always extras. Still, probably worth it for the talented Sven. If she enjoys card games, for example, he could play Gin Rummy all evening and poker all night.
They’re not designed that way, but why not give it a go?
Just as long as she understands that she can’t force you to do anything your wife’s not comfortable with.

Slap me with a splintered ruler

That would be quite ironic, if you think about it.

PS: still having some problems with the spam filter on comments. If you’ve been approved, you’ll be fine, if you’ve asked for approval, try again, you should be on the list.

Don’t worry, she’ll pass some of the money he’s paid on to you – after deducting expenses and her management fee, obviously.
Yet another lady who feels she has been left without any choice. I think she ought to have a bit more self-confidence, don’t you?
After almost a full day of the three-day trial was spent on vigorous cross-examination of the delivery boy, it won’t surprise you to learn there was an appeal for a mis-trial. The Appeal Court upheld her decision, after re-examining the delivery boy and testing the validity of his testimony at length.
It’s actually a very practical fetish to have, in a cold climate anyway.
Madame Katarina is very protective about that jacket – but she also dislikes the sight of male faces, although she’s learnt to just about bear them as long as they are puffy and crying.
Couples often have a hard time learning to accept one another’s pets. Perhaps a goldfish would have been easier.