Category: caption

Relentlessly romantic

And it makes her life easier too – she can focus her disciplinary efforts on gratifying her own sexual desires, instead of constantly having to make you scream for mercy over simple household tasks inadequately carried out.
You don’t want to make it her problem, believe me. She employs very effective problem-solving techniques.
Well she could look a bit more interested! I mean, here you are, ready to scream your guts out as you thrash around in agony for everyone else’s pleasure…
I can date to the very day – almost to the very stroke – the moment I reached the same realisation, in my own blissfully happy marriage.
She’ll get the hang of it. You can’t make an omelette without breaking a few kitchen slaves, am I right?
Actually, she’s unfairly disparaging* AFM’s technology section here. Just in the last few issues they’ve reviewed all the latest electronic air fresheners – focusing on how easy it is to change the scent they disperse – they’ve had some fascinating pieces on the microfungus ecologies that thrive and provide such rich aromas from even the cleanest armpits and they have tested out all of the latest AI models with a carefully standardised prompt crafted to induce them to describe a particular activity (can’t remember what it was) in as much detail as possible. Plus reviews of shaving technologies obviously.

*But then, Ms Palvin is very welcome to disparage me unfairly as hard and as often as she wants. I live for the hope that one day she will.

If you don’t like what I’m sayin’ then won’t you slap my face?

Because I’m bad. And because I’ve been bad.

And she’s his everything, so that’s worked out quite well.
Yeah. I mainly look at pervy pictures of women on the Internet for the articles anyway.
Actually, almost anything causes impotence, for a male in a relationship with a sufficiently determined woman. The trick is finding something that temporarily removes it.
Oooh ohh – look at me, I was castrated! Like anyone cares, loser.
Just as well.. her mother’s only topic of conversation seems to be how you don’t deserve her daughter, while when his own ball-gag’s not in, her father only talks about how perfect and wonderful his wife is and how lucky he is to be under her guidance. Family, eh? I’d buckle the ball-gag on myself.
Obviously their fetish play gear isn’t all entirely unsuitable for the more serious purposes they have in mind. Some of the whips are painful enough for real use and you can always stamp on fingers or other bits with a good solid pair of boots. They do also wear latex, although mostly in the form of heavy, long aprons for when things get messy, not the skimpy little numbers so beautifully on display here.

Deliberate acts of obedience

OK, that’s good. Because I imagine you’ve been thinking about it quite a lot too, right?
The three of them discovered they share a common interest.
It’s cleaner than it was… no squashed beetles for a start.
Men often feel uncomfortable dressed in female clothing. She just wants to make sure, that’s all.
According to my SO, it’s a mistake in BDSM to draw a distinction between sexy and painful punishment. Some punishments just have more of both, that’s all – and those are the best, of course, I can’t say she’s wrong about that.
Nothing like being desperately uncomfortable to keep yourself in the moment.

All for her

Women are more sensitive to other people’s pain than are men. It’s an empathy thing.
Nothing quite so off-putting in a shining session as catching sight of your own face. Bleagh!
There are many rules of client meetings but ‘she’s always right’ covers most of them.
Doesn’t seem fair, really, when my own ‘secret sauce’ is all bottled up.
Don’t worry: Mistress Elizabeth offered to repay the time. Let’s see… two minutes and her time’s worth… what, a million times yours? So that’s… let’s see… using all my fingers… carry the one… 3.8 years hard labour. Oh, might as well round it up to four. Let’s hope she’s a kind mistress.
To be fair, no Mistress I’ve ever visited has ever called me by my real name.

Whip smart

Just to cite one possibility, at random, among so many.
The Honourable Dogbreath-Twattington takes his role very seriously and never reaches a decision without careful thought about the possible consequences of getting it wrong.
Some prefer candles and soft music but they’ve discovered through much experimentation that this is what works for them.
He’ll thank her for it eventually, you’ll see.
Oh, I hate playing the ‘guess what I stepped in’ game. Surprisingly enough, for instance, beetles and slugs taste very similar, despite actually coming from entirely separate phylla of the animal kingdom.
Oooh kerosene play! Quite edgy if you currently have quite a lot of body hair, I understand.

Women’s men

It took a while for me to get used to our D/S dynamic in restaurants. I used to get embarassed at being so publicly submissive – even over what are actually practical and necessary things like, for example, my SO requesting that my food be given a quick whizz in the liquidiser so it can more easily pass through my feeding funnel. But you soon realise that the waitresses just don’t care: they’ve got jobs to do, after all.
That’s awfully generous of her.
I can do some quite spectacular things with it. Just not while having sex. Or at least, spectacular things have occasionally been done to it, by mischievous and highly creative people.
She has a keenly attuned sense of what your needs really are.
She’s got a little whip on which each of the thongs is studded with diamonds cut into sharp little points. Some might think that’s overdoing it, but she thinks it and the marks that it leaves are pretty and as long as she likes it, really who is to question her taste? Not me, certainly.
Form an orderly queue by the stage door…. Hey! I said an orderly queue! Look, if you can’t even follow simple instructions, she’s hardly likely to …

An unfair crack of the whip

More captioned images celebrating the delightful ways our superiors can be unreasonable and unfair.

Trying to top from the bottom again, were you? She’s wise to your little power-play.
Try thinking of her needs rather than your own, for a change.
If he correctly picks a yellow one he gets an orgasm. So there’s that to look forward to.
Just remember the two absolute rules: (1) never lie to Mistress and (2) Mistress is always right. As long as your answer conforms to both of those, you should be fine.
She likes it done just right. It never, ever is.
Oh dear. And the punishment was nearly done before that little act of defiance.

Lady Sophia Black, who I can tell you from personal and painful but wonderful experience did the ‘impossible to please’ thing better than any other domme I have ever known.