business – Contemplating the divine

Spoken for

She’s already apologised to her sister on your behalf, but that doesn’t mean you won’t be going round to her place to apologise directly, too – and offer to make amends, of course.

Must be terrifying being tiny. Good thing there are big strong girls like her around to look after you.

Understandable that he wants to make sure, given that the two of them will be working so closely together every day, but sometimes a candidate arrives at an interview and just makes such a strong impression from the start that you know she’s going to get the job.

That’s the divine Heather, being contemplated in the scene above.

Many people don’t realise that in English, like very gendered languages such as Japanese, there are words that women can use that men cannot. But there are.

Sometimes an unexpected, spur-of-the-moment session can be best. One time, for instance, I was walking home late at night and clumsily bumped into one of a group of girls. Given no time to apologise properly, I was beaten up, kicked repeatedly in the balls and face, robbed, spat on and left penniless lying in a side-alley. When you think of all the emails and careful arrangements you’d need to do that with a pro-domme….

Good boys always follow

As Ms Harry said, and I don’t think there’s any arguing with that.

I’m just relieved that the pins all the bridesmaids were issued with are for symbolic purposes. I’d imagined… well, it doesn’t matter, does it?

Males have difficulty sometimes in following through the logical consequences of their own statements. It’s not really their fault, they’re just morons.

Her company takes bullying very seriously. So does she.

Part of the reason the Kerbside Sexist Service is so popular, of course, is the generous rebates of up to 1000% on the subscription fee, paid by the sexists themselves. It makes ‘peace of mind’ very affordable.

Yeah, weird that. Mine are mostly for locksmiths, for reasons I’ve never understood, but at least that’s not something my SO could find objectionable, I suppose.

She is your everything

… which is just as well, as you’re her nothing.

Oddly enough, I was actually engaged in SPH play years before I even knew what it was – in the school changing room, for instance. I guess I’m just a natural.

Don’t worry, she generally just takes little light puffs, she doesn’t pull on it to drag it down quickly. Unless she’s had a hard day or something like that, obviously.

In a very real sense, marriage to her is a stress position, so it’s all good practice.

I find being on a leash quite reassuring. My SO got one of those extendable ones – you know, that have a kind of wheel that can pay out to allow the pet to run off some way – and I have to say, I felt almost agoraphobic with it on. Unfortunately, it broke one day when I was fetching it, and after a good hard discussion of why ‘it broke’ I was dragged out of the door on the good old chain.

Bunnies are actually savage little creatures. True fact (read Watership Down). Perhaps that’s what inspires these lovely ladies.

Hmm… looks like Jake was a bit surprised by that! He really shouldn’t have been – anyone could have guessed that Bluetooth connectivity was likely to come up. Now he’s going to get all embarrassed by having his ignorance shown up right there on stage.

Number 42 in the series, apparently! How many roads must a man walk down before he reaches a turning point, eh? OK, one, I suppose, as if he was on a second road he would presumably already have passed a turning point. OK, so not a good analogy, but you see what I’m trying to say here, right? Erm… anyway, I’ll just get on with the not-quite-femdom captions, now.

Wicked, flagitious, tyrannical acts

If you’re worried about whether you’ll be able to please her sexually – don’t be. You have plenty of pain receptors and a full set of vocal chords, and that’s all you’ll need.

Obviously, I visit sex workers, although I have to confess I’ve never really understood why the ladies I visit call themselves by that title.

Looks to me like they’re considering him quite seriously already. I think he’s got a good chance of getting through to the next stage: in-depth assessment.

She’s just looking for the right man. I’m sure when she does find him, she’ll keep him.

I expect he’ll be taking those opportunities; it would be so ungrateful not to.

Turn it into love

Or into something. Music is by the divine M i s t r e s s Kylie. Equally importantly, it has the word ‘turn’ in the title, which is the clue as to today’s theme.

Benevolent brutality

She’ll work around it. A relationship is founded on how the partners feel about one another; things like whips and canes and tawses are just the physical expressions of that.

He’s not actually naturally balding; she just prefers him that way as she says it tickles less when she’s watching TV.

Wow – sounds like you might have an important assignment on your very first day!

He doesn’t need to check his privilege because she’s checking it thoroughly on his behalf.

Classic Cruella, of course, featuring the stunning Lady Sonia and the lovely Lynda Leigh. And some bloke, probably with an ugly moustache, but who cares, eh?

You might as well blame yourself. After all, *she*‘s going to be blaming you and it’s not as if anyone else cares.

I think we know what’ll happen to Rob if he doesn’t make more of an effort. Rob doesn’t, but he’s more brawn than brains.

Those uncomfortable conversations

Try not to pity her boyfriend too much, abject slave to his desires though he is: he doesn’t know any better, poor soul.

Don’t worry: she’s not really going to change her name to Mrs Pencildick. As a matter of fact, her husband’s the one who’s going to be legally changing his surname. To hers, obviously, although she is considering making him change his *first* name officially to Pencildick, or some such, at the same time.

It’s the same algorithm that sends you all those dick enlargement emails. Oh… you thought they were just spam? No, they’re very carefully targetted. Most other guys don’t get them.

When setting up a session with a new domme I usually ask her to treat me with utter contempt and disdain and I have to say, my experience has been that they’re all startlingly good at it. Sometimes I don’t even ask and they still get it right… I guess experienced dommes develop a kind of sixth sense for what their clients are looking for.

He obviously survived to a ripe old age… imagine him keeping the book all those decades, turning the pages occasionally to reminisce over his days under Miss Rathbone’s loving tyranny, only for the book to be sold to a second-hand shop after his death. Still: looks like it’s found an appreciative home.

…and just a little bit of found femdom to finish (do hurry up and finish, won’t you? Your wife will be back soon and you don’t want her to find you like this). More divine Joy…. who has done this many, many times before and she totally, totally knows…

We must accept finite disappointment, but never lose infinite hope

So true. Martin Luther King said that and if I’m honest (I’m not, in general – see the disclaimer to the side of the blog, there), he was probably talking about something other than femdom chastity regimes. But you never know.

You did bring the Travel Scrabble, right?

This is the lovely Little Caprice, most of whose oeuvre is unsuitable for viewing by the omega-males who read this blog (and I had to crop the image above to make it suitable) so don’t go googling her, OK?