Stories and pictures themed around female domination and male subjugation and servitude. Unsuitable for children, for alpha males, for hard-core practitioners with an interest in the politics of bdsm and the mechanics of complicated rope work. Of interest to perverts like me, basically.
… with me as the frog.
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| She’s trying to de-clutter. |
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| Should last her until the spring, her favourite time of the year, when the first fresh green nettles start to arrive. |
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| It’s probably that damn dog. The same one that keeps stealing her used underwear. |
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| It’s a service industry. |
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| I guess she would. Vigorously, immediately and without mercy. |
It’s easy if you try – and find the right life-partner.
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| How do you like them apples? |
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| Aww… that’s rather sweet. I hope he’ll be OK after she retires next monh. |
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| I can’t stand those macho men who boast about the size of their chastity belts, can you? It’s not the size that matters anyway, it’s what you’re not allowed to do with it. |
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| Now isn’t that just typical? Something goes wrong and she just assumes it’s Roger’s fault! Maybe the guests got the date wrong, did she think of that? I expect Roger’ll have a few words to say to her, if he can still speak after the whipping. And if she removes the spreader gag, obviously. |
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| Of course, if she’s fully paid up with a lump sum, then the longer he lives, the more it’ll cost the divorcee storage firm. Still, I’m sure they won’t allow thoughts of that to divert them from behaving professionally towards him at all times. |
….and just forRalph D:
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| Men and their gadgets. You can give him just as unpleasant a night with some good old-fashioned rope, a cold dripping shower and some nipple clamps. Why does everything have to be so hi tech? |
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| Regular readers will have gathered by now that this is a very, very hard limit for me. I’m careful never to tell my SO, though, so it’s just a secret between you, dear Internet, and me. |
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| Sounds like their sex life is about to improve. Well, hers is. His doesn’t sound like it’s worth keeping, really. |
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| That is a lot simpler. Like her approach to marital arguments: also very simple indeed. |
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| I am actually very sensitive to gender issues in the workplace. Painfully sensitive, even. When women are treated disrespectfully I feel physically bruised: sometimes immediately, sometimes a while later. |
Seems like you got a pink kink in your think!
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| Thank goodness I’m not going to be the only one there in pink, anyway. |
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| I only went for the make-up tips anyway. |
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| Ah – the rolling pin! Just in that sweet spot between loving domestic discipline and cranial fracture. |
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| Time to come out and play! |
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| Nor are there many rhymes for “penectomy”. I mean, you can just about work something in with “respect for me” but it’s a bit contrived, don’t you think? And we don’t like to have excessively contrived notions here on Contemplating the Divine, as you probably know. |
… and I just want to check none of you would be terribly offended by that?*
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| I think he might have forgotten, actually. Hope they’re not too upset. |
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| I’d like to hear the good news, very, very slowly? |
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| As submissive as she wants, in practice. |
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| I don’t know what I was thinking… |
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| Men have too much stuff. Most men do, anyway. I have an iron and a mop I’m very proud of… otherwise pretty minimalist. |
* Warning: American or other readers familiar with Peter Capaldi only as the twelth doctor might find themselves disturbed by this. Possibly even ‘extremely miffed’.
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| And she’s actually having a lot more heterosexual sex than before the change, so it’s all going rather well. |
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| Oh no, not Oliver. I just don’t think we have anything in common, you know? |
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| Hmmm… Maybe if she worked in metric? |
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| Oh well. On with the marital bliss, I suppose. |
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| I’m usually in the corner at parties, myself. |
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| I won’t give away the ending. Oh all right then, I will. The book falls off and he gets the crap beaten out of him with a perspex cane. OK? |
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| Now I understand why they make the interns wear shorts. |
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| erm… Translation? Rotation? Summation? |
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| I’ve heard that if you insult the waiting staff in some restaurants, they’ll spit into your food. But I just can’t bring myself to be other than grovellingly respectful to a waitress. What’s a sub to do? |
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| One day she’ll meet Mr Perfect and won’t feel the need to enslave and degrade him. One day. |
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| Try hopping back and forth from one leg to the other. That can help a lot. |
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| Well, OK, as long as it’s safe, sane, consensual and well-deserved. Or any two of those, anwyay. |
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| People say that to keep up a diet you have to be really strict with yourself, but I’ve found that someone else being strict works just as well. |
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| While you’re down there, you notice Simon’s shoes are quite badly scuffed – and there’s a client meeting later. What do you do? (a) say nothing, (b) let him know or (c) give them a quick polish yourself, as you’re there anyway. Take your time, there are no ‘wrong’ answers. |
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| Well, as long as she remembers to keep it charged this time. |
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| It’s a small town, so the walk of shame afterwards will only take you 15 minutes or so. |
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| I had a very traditional upbringing – strict discipline, cold showers, that kind of thing. It cost about £450 but it was worth every penny and I’m going back in a few weeks for another one. |
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| Goodness, if you can’t trust your cleaner with that sort of trivial responsibility, why would you even let her into the house? |
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| Ahhh male doms. I think male doms are just great, in their proper place. |
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| Perhaps you’d better approach the bench. |
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| Don’t worry – she’ll give her one more chance. She’s quite forgiving really. She’s just cross because she’s got to go to all the trouble of murdering you and disposing of the body, that’s all. |
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| I myself am very firmly opposed to corporal punishment. Forunately, nobody pays a blind bit of attention to my views. |
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| She’s good at riddles, too. |
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| Send him out? Honestly, Henry shouldn’t let her just boss him around like that. He should stand up for himself… be a man. |
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| He does. But I’m sure he’s grateful inside. The British Institution – not to be confused with the Royal Institution, although the one time the BBC made that mistake was the best Christmas science lecture series ever. |
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| See if you can spot the eight men concealed within this picture! |
