bootlicking – Contemplating the divine

Beauty is power; a smile is its sword

The back is mostly devoted to warnings about how ugly the front is. But fortunately it’s quite hard to read through all the welts.

Those early feminist books were groundbreaking, but modern female supremacist thinking, with its emphasis on sexual inequality and the importance of women’s autonomy over their boys’ bodies, has moved on.

Their corporate philosophy is that every boy can progress to the absolute limit of his potential, with the right guidance and incentives.

And some sexists think that boys are better at quantitative skills than girls! I’d like to see them beat her at this game.

She doesn’t mind being stopped in the street by admirers. She’s even got a little ‘E’ mini branding iron and is only too happy to heat it up with a lighter, for an autograph.

Boots do furnish a room

Today’s special celebrates that most elegant of female footwear (and ankle, calf and, excitingly, occasionally thighwear): the boot. As well as looking and tasting lovely, boots are highly practical and can be used for all kinds of kicking, crushing and treading underfoot. Plus, they’re so easy to get clean and the wearer can even be paid while waiting for the process to be completed to her satisfaction. Boots boots boots boots…*

Both wearing boots in this image. But she’s doing all the work… in so many ways.

She’s blended in quite well with village life: she rides a lot, takes part in the hunt and has even paid to have the quaint old stocks in ther market square repaired and brought back into use.

The delightful Princess Neive, whom I deeply regret never having had the chance to meet when she was working. There are videos of her around… listen to her lovely giggle.

More country pursuits. He provides all the gear they need as well, although some of the whips and sets of spurs are hardly suitable to be used on poor, defenseless horses.

Coincidentally, after his session, her client admitted to being the managing director of one of the largest cold-calling centres in the country. He later regretted telling her that, but she didn’t: she found it motivated her to greater creativity.

Everything my SO says to me is in the imperative, regardless of the precise grammatical form she uses.

I think dommes should tell dumb sub jokes to even the score. “Why did the sub stare for hours at the carton of orange juice?” Because his Mistress fucking told him to.

* Marching up and down again.

Occasionally I put found femdom down here. Now this isn’t found femdom. It’s just a funny little video imagining vikings with modern Scandinavian accents and attitudes. But if you watch to the end, the last second or so is just a little bit Contemplating the Divine. Just a little. But it’s not worth skipping to the end, just watch the video if you think the ‘modern viking’ thing sounds amusing and treat the last moment as a bonus.

Beautifully devastating

Then he can stop being brave and, indeed, stop being a boy, at least on some definitions.

He might have added a gentle little pat, at times, and they’ll be giving him their own version of that too.

He’s got another uniform just as smart as the one you can see in the picture, but with more lace trimming.

Although if you’ve got an existing organ donor card, apparently that already covers it – you’re considered to have donated any organs that seem unlikely to be put to productive use, so they’re free for the taking. Some men have been a bit surprised to discover that, on waking up from a minor unrelated operation, but it’s right there in the small print.

Oh well, I suppose you can be grateful she’s not getting one of those cow milking devices with four tubes, for doing Robert, you and a couple of others all at the same time. For now.

Castigatrices

If it’s any consolation, it wouldn’t necessarily be about to go any better if you *had* left her with a choice.

Many ‘funky’ office redesigns just don’t consider the everyday needs of the users.I mean, how’s she supposed to receive oral sex, sitting on that thing, just to take one obvious example?

Try to guess what she’s thinking. Don’t worry: you can have as many goes as you like.

Good thing she’s leaving a note that he doesn’t like ball-busting. The OWK ladies always want to know about such things.

There’s a thing some of them like to do with the boots, too.

Inattention seeking

Her book’s much more interesting than you, after all… although now I come to think of it, almost everything is, isn’t it? No, you can just nod quietly: permission to speak is still rescinded.

She offers a very specialised service. Well, I say ‘offers’ – she doesn’t actually give subs the opportunity to refuse.

You probably won’t have many things to talk about anyway, once he realises she doesn’t mind you sucking him off.

You might be surprised they were able when drunk to remember it all to tell the registry people, but of course they could just read it off the tattoo.

Don’t worry: Madame Sarka will realise immediately what really happened and will know it wasn’t his fault. She won’t *care*, obviously, but she *will* know and that should be some comfort at least as she’s beating the crap out of him and screaming abuse at him in Czech.

Hell hath no fury like a woman…

…does.

Men don’t really understand stuff like that, unless it’s slapped into them.

It’s a symbolic denial of heterosexuality, you see. And a rather practical and concrete physical one too, of course.

Actually, of course, lady Vikings didn’t usually go raiding. No: they waited at home, standing there tapping their feet and idly stroking their whips as their apologetic husbands returned with more meagre and unsatisfactory booty. There is a reason Vikings were so fierce, you know.

Of course, it doesn’t take the human element out completely – it can’t whip you, for instance.

Thank goodness for that. She must have been quite distraught.

Even if you’re sure it’s not yours (and let’s face it – in your condition, you can be reasonably confident it isn’t, right?) it’s polite to offer to lick it off.

You made the rules and you could not see

…y ou made a life out of hurting me.

Males always have disgusting things in mind. It’s not their fault (but that’s no reason to let them off a beating for it) – they *are* disgusting.

Contrary to the stereotype about women’s sexual preferences, findommes tend to want to skip the foreplay of little teasing gifts and just get straight into deep penetration of their partners’ bank accounts.

She’s going to be hanging around in lingerie a lot from now on. It’s just her making sure, to show how she feels about you.

I was about to ask whether there’s anything worse than having a lovely pair of shoes when your chain’s *just* too short for your lips to reach them… but there are worse things, obviously. Many, many worse things – as my SO has been kind enough to teach me, over the years.

This could explain some of the apparently random and heartless decisions global companies have taken in recent years, actually. Maybe I’ll write something for the Harvard Business Review.

Must be nice for Kate and her boy, being ‘out’. I’ve had to read up about epilepsy, because that’s our cover story if anyone ever sees me writhing around on the floor gasping incoherently after saying the wrong thing to my SO (or looking like I might be about to). Still, I suppose that’s a small price to pay for living the fantasy in reality.

A surprising facility for pain

Essentially the title is purely descriptive: we are back (after waking up woozily, dangling upside down, swaying around sickeningly as the abduction van tackles the winding country lanes) in the Facility. It’s a woman-owned, woman-run business that provides an ideal country break. Women can relax here, while men can get away from the stresses and cares of their everday lives to experience stresses and cares that are so, so much worse, for as long as their sponsors decide to keep them there.

Held in contempt

Have a bit of empathy for goodness’ sake: she’s not actually ‘asking’ here… mars and venus thing, you know?

Curiously enough, none of them confessed until she got to level 11, then three did, all at the same time. So of course she had to carry on a bit to sort out who was telling the truth and who lying. Which *was* a bit hard on the other six, I suppose, but fairness is important to her so she wanted to be sure who was guilty.

They’ll be bringing you a special meal and drinks, so be sure to tell them if there’s anything you really don’t enjoy eating.

They can still have a lot of mushrooming fun. The woods are full of fungal growths: on the mossy ground, around the base of tree-trunks, growing on rotting old logs. A few of them are poisonous to humans, though, so she should find a way of testing for toxicity before taking any home to cook.

They used to have cigarette girls too, astonishing though it is to think of that today.

Kitten’s sympathetic face is pretty good, don’t you think? She had to practise it a lot, when she was starting out, because she didn’t find it easy.

Relentlessly romantic

And it makes her life easier too – she can focus her disciplinary efforts on gratifying her own sexual desires, instead of constantly having to make you scream for mercy over simple household tasks inadequately carried out.

You don’t want to make it her problem, believe me. She employs very effective problem-solving techniques.

Well she could look a bit more interested! I mean, here you are, ready to scream your guts out as you thrash around in agony for everyone else’s pleasure…

I can date to the very day – almost to the very stroke – the moment I reached the same realisation, in my own blissfully happy marriage.

She’ll get the hang of it. You can’t make an omelette without breaking a few kitchen slaves, am I right?

Actually, she’s unfairly disparaging* AFM’s technology section here. Just in the last few issues they’ve reviewed all the latest electronic air fresheners – focusing on how easy it is to change the scent they disperse – they’ve had some fascinating pieces on the microfungus ecologies that thrive and provide such rich aromas from even the cleanest armpits and they have tested out all of the latest AI models with a carefully standardised prompt crafted to induce them to describe a particular activity (can’t remember what it was) in as much detail as possible. Plus reviews of shaving technologies obviously.

*But then, Ms Palvin is very welcome to disparage me unfairly as hard and as often as she wants. I live for the hope that one day she will.